Crocktoberfest

dinner party

2009-01-11T16:36:00.001-05:00

Last night, Reese and I hosted our first dinner party here at our new house. Attendees were Andrea, Ted, Jackson and Rollo - as well as Reese and myself. It was a damn good time. It was so nice to have some very close friends over to eat, BS and talk general nonsense. Everyone else's dinner looked pretty good. They ate stuffed shells. I was supposed to get my fat-free version of stuffed shells, but we didn't have any fat-free ricotta cheese. So, I had to settle for a fat-free pizza instead. I certainly wasn't complaining.

Jackson was hilarious. That kid farts just like his old man. Throughout the night, he blasted some serious butt wind. He got to play with Trevor, our golden retriever pup and they got along so well. I was particularly proud of Trevor for being such a good dog when it came to his first interaction with a baby. That makes me believe that he'll do really well with junior when he/she comes along in a few months.

The rest of the night, we had some good times. Jackson enjoyed some ringtones, we talked about the upcoming fantasy baseball season (which is by far the most impressive league in which I've been involved) and even completed our long-awaited ShamWOW experiment! (ShamWOW works particularly well on pie-plates filled with water)

Reese and I are getting some damn good parenting advice from Ted & Anne. For instance, Anne swears by using cloth diapers as burp rags. I wholeheartedly agree. It's just too bad we might never get to put her knowledge to good use! Reese's mom likes to sew, and she makes custom burp rags as if she was running a sweatshop full of vietnamese adolsecents. Its so helpful to have a couple that's close to us to rely on when it comes to suggestions like these. I'd never even know what a diaper genie was if it wasn't for Anne. And we WILL have one of those before kiddo arrives.

We all agreed to do this whole dinner thing again really soon. I'm MORE than looking forward to it. It was seriously a great time.

king of the hill

2009-01-09T21:20:00.001-05:00

Okay, so it seems I was dead wrong about King of the Hill. I've been watching it regularly this week on Adult Swim and I'm damn glad I have. It definitely was a bit much for my taste, back in the day. When I was in high school, my thing was Futurama. Always has, always will be. It definitely wasn't anything close to what Futurama is, and although it preceeded Futurama by several years - I have certain tastes that must be satisfied. Yes, my tastes have evolved over the years so I can honestly say I can appreciate KOTH. Good stuff there!

On a side note, my friend Justin finally received his custom license plate that he's been waiting MONTHS to receive. What's it say? "JRIZZLE". That shit's hilarious! In my opinion, an excellent way to spend 20-some bucks.

adult swim's lineup

2009-01-04T22:30:00.001-05:00

I'm a huge fan of Adult Swim. I've been an Aqua Teen since the very first episode back when I was in high school. I could probably recite the entire episode "Pierrot le Fou" from Cowboy Bebop. I'm usually pretty keen on anything that gets thrown into the Adult Swim lineup. That being said, I'm not entirely sure where King of the Hill fits in... Don't get me wrong, I sincerely appreciate AS reviving Family Guy in the early 2000's. I just don't know about KOTH. (Oh, and I'll be referring to Adult Swim from here on as AS)

I remember back in 1997, when I was a spry, young lad - I had heard about King of the Hill and really liked its concept. After all, Mike Judge pedigree isn't anything to immediatley write off. I suffered through many Sundays at 8:30pm. I can vividly recall the disappointment I'd experience as the Simpsons ended and KOTH signaled the start of a new week of school. I truly tried to enjoy it, but it never really grew on me. Sure, Bobby was funny - but Hank and Peggy are just... weird... Maybe its the whole Texas mentality, where certain things are a certain way no matter how liberal you tend to think. So will I give KOTH another try? I sure will. Maybe my immature mind wasn't capable of handling 1997 comedy. Either way, here's my stand on it - I don't necessarily agree with it, but I'll definitely give it another go.

Another addition to the AS lineup is The PJ's - another late 90's toon that I absolutely hated. Back in 99, I wasn't at all interested in a claymation cartoon about a poor family. I seriously thought it was going to be nothing more than a cartoon sitcom. I couldn't have been more wrong. Since The PJ's have been airing on AS, I've been watching them. This is some hilarious cartoonsmanship. I never knew it was about life in the projects - no, I didn't know PJ's stood for projects. These characters cuss, drop sexual and ethnic innuendo like crazy and just poke fun at life in general. AS did some great work in digging this show out of the archives.

And speaking of the archives, AS pulled Clerks: The Animated Series out of the woodwork. This is one of my most favorite cartoons OF ALL TIME. Back in 2003, Comedy Central had an incredible lineup of cartoons that aired from midnight to 3:00am. It included the likes of Clerks, Duckman, Gary & Mike, Undergrads and Dilbert. That lineup got me through my first half of college. (If anyone from AS reads this, PLEASE book all of those shows..) So, my sincerest thanks for bringing Clerks aboard.

2009 is starting off in grand fashion.

the first trimester

2009-01-03T10:50:00.000-05:00

So now that I'm fully awake and the cold medicine has worn off, I'm finally able to pen some thoughts. I don't think I've really blogged much about our pregnancy, so that's where I'd like to begin.

Yesterday marked the eleven-week milestone of our pregnancy, with only one more week to go until we swing into the second trimester. I really didn't expect the first trimester to go so quickly. We had our first ultrasound and it went well - we got to see the "shrimp" (as Reese calls it) moving around and we heard the heartbeat twice. Everything is progressing quite nicely as we approach week twelve. Aside from the doctor's visits, I really didn't know what to do as far as my role in this whole process goes. All I knew was Reese was going to be undergoing some major changes, and I needed to be prepared for them and be there for her. She did go through some intense changes, but she really handled them well. I know if it were me going through this transition, I'd be a huge baby about it. She really hunkered down and got through it. Morning sickness is the major offender here, but I find that an intense workout, followed by a thorough lifting program really helps Reese... Haha, I'm kidding... Soups, crackers, peppermint gum, lucky charms - all are truly helpful in dealing with morning sickness and we've got plenty of each stocking our pantry. We're really hoping that the next trimester brings some morning sickness relief.

To help me become a better daddy, and to help me stick to my new year's resolution, I've been reading a fantastic, daddy-to-be book called "The Expectant Father" by Armin A. Brott & Jennifer Ash. So far I've read through the second month, and its really been helpful in providing me specifics about how Reese is feeling, how I'm feeling, common thoughts of new fathers and questions & answers to things I may not have thought about. I'm reading this thing cover to cover, and I'm going to pick up any book that it recommends (which, so far are two additional books - "The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the First Year" and "A Dad's Guide to the Toddler Years"). Preparation is key.

Speaking of preparation, before we got pregnant Reese and I decided that when we did concieve, we'd immediately begin socking away a certain amount of money each month towards a fund for our child. We've been doing that since October, but it was just recently that we actually placed the funds in the appropriate account. I want to give this kid every advantage that I didn't have growing up, starting with a college (or whatever) fund.

So as we look towards the coming months, and I seem to be getting the hang of this dad thing more and more, I'll be sure to blog any time something special happens. At the very least, this process is keeping me closer to Reese than I've ever been before in my life, and that's really amazing. Good times!

new years resolution

2009-01-02T21:32:00.001-05:00

I had a really decent blog put together in my mind. Too bad I'm knee deep in some nyquil and I won't get any of it on digital paper at the moment.

My new year's resolution is to read more. Not crappy internet articles and news posts. Actual books. I resolve to own more books and actually READ them. I'll post the real thing soon. Damn you, nyquil. Err... Equate brand nyquil...

happy new year

2009-01-01T12:07:00.001-05:00

And a happy new headliner! Turkey went out last night and I was able to take this photo of him! What a hooch hound!

christmas eve

2008-12-29T13:50:00.001-05:00

So, here's my tale of lore for this year's Christmas eve.

I was driving down a stretch of highway near Oil City around noon when I had to make a left turn. Reese, Mom Welms and myself were in her mom's Escape with myself driving. I'm preparing to make my left turn when some dude in a large Chevy Silverado decided to try and make me move over into the other lane by making an illegal turn onto the highway. I know the turn he made is illegal because I frequently make that turn and in doing so, always take note of the sign that says ALL TRAFFIC MUST TURN RIGHT. So, I don't move over for the jerk - after all, he made an illegal turn, and I'm going to be making a perfectly legal left turn in about ten seconds. The dude comes inches away from slamming into the Escape, so I lay on the horn. And I mean LAYYYYYYYYY on it. To be a hard-ass, he drives up along side me and starts shouting profanities at me, while hanging out of his window. At this point, I say to myself - "What could possibly piss him off more than what I just did?" So, I begin to laugh INCREDIBLY hard at him making a total ass out of himself. This infuriates him to the point of challenging me to pull my vehicle over and step outside with him. All the while I'm trying to keep myself together enough to make the actual turn I had intended. I end up making my turn, but not before Reese's mom winds the window down and informs him that we have his plate number and that we'll be reporting him to the cops.

I couldn't believe it either. I wanted to belt out something clever like "I'm sure your wife will be at home just waiting for another black eye, why waste one on me?" but seriously, this stuff was one of the funniest situations I've ever had the pleasure to be a part of. That dude was a piece of work!

I wish Reese would have wished him a Merry Christmas, like she had wanted to...

how the grinch stole direct tv

2008-12-22T21:22:00.001-05:00

Whilst browsing my DirectTV lineup the other day, I happened upon a block of time for Dr. Seuss' "How the Grinch Stole Christmas". I'm a bit new to the whole digital television experience, so I'm still exploring the descriptions of shows. It read:

"A curmudgeon seeks to end Christmas merrymaking in a town below Mt. Crumpet"

I love hidden nuggets of comedy like this. I stuff like this all the damn time to Rollo, but I swear out of every fifty-some I post / create / make, he only ends up finding three. Seriously, when my time is up on this planet and Rollo is still around - the greatest gift I could ever give would be to have him keep finding the shit I left him many years ago.

Wow, that took a morose turn. All I'm trying to say is DirectTV is hilarious and Rollo does not pay a damn bit of attention to anything.

new headliner & present

2008-12-20T12:10:00.001-05:00

In the grand spirit of the most egotistical Christmas present ever - I give you this link.

There, you'll find each headliner image I've used this year - in case you found any one particularly funny or rediculous.

Enjoy the new headliner. And yes, it's included in the present.

overpasses & home

2008-12-05T20:54:00.001-05:00

After driving under an overpass today I realized that for the past few years, and for the foreseeable future, I will be driving under exactly one overpass on my drive home from work. True, I don't live where I used to, but I definitely can appreciate consistency. Why, do I think of such things? Well, it all started when I began listening to The Killers album "Sams Town" in 2006. This has slowly become one my most favorite discs in my collection. I throw the CD in the player, and almost instantly the worst day in my life can melt away like a springtime thaw. But I digress - I play the CD and I can just tune out and think. The disc is THAT good. I'll listen to the title track to that disc quite frequently and just tune into the outside world on my ride home.

That's how I came to the conclusion that I encounter exactly one overpass during my drive home.

new home

2008-12-02T21:00:00.001-05:00

So I've been moved into our new home for about a week and a half now, and I'm seemingly supposed to have a grip on all things boxed. I'd have to be hallucinating if I thought this house was becoming any more box-free. I'm guessing I'll work through these as I've worked through all my life's compartmental issues - I'll either put em in the attic or toss em in the basement for later review!

Here I am, all grown up. The owner of a newly renovated home and a father-to-be. Reese is definitely pregnant! We went to our first doctor's visit last week and got grilled by the doctor about our family history. I didn't need to answer much, but I considered myself the "Mike Tomlin" of the meeting:

"We'll take it one day at a time. We're gonna continue to do what we do... Mitch Berger..."

New baby, or "Shrimp" as Reese calls it, will tell us whether it's a male or female sometime in March. (And quite honestly, it does not matter to me what the sex is - I just want what's best for the shrimp: to be healthy, happy and RICH BEYOND THEIR WILDEST DREAMS)

We've decided on names. Actually, we've been set on those for a while. If it's a girl, her name will be Gladys Alice Cat Stevens Crockett. A boy - Ron Burgundy Balthazar "The Duke" Crockett.

november headliner

2008-11-16T11:58:00.002-05:00

I lazily added a November theme'd headliner. Took me all of two seconds to create. Yeah, holiday spirit!

I might improve it as November drags on.

delicious turkey

2008-10-28T09:38:00.001-04:00

As October winds down, and we proceed to the notoriously worst month of my life, I can't help but recall the one thing that actually brightens my outlook for November. Some would argue that I'm referring to the return of Thursday night football. Others would say that it's the night before Thanksgiving. Uneducated guessers maintain that it's Black Friday. Nay to each, I'm talking about the day I engaged my wife.

True, I don't give Reese much credit in my digital antics. She's rarely mentioned in a lovey-dovey way around these parts, mainly because I lived through the whole "lets tell tales of our puppy love by writing endless paragraphs in our ICQ info" era, and let me tell you - I'm glad to be well removed from that.

November 11, 2007 was a day I'll remember til the day I get Alzheimer's. I decide to go running. Reese didn't like the cold and wanted to go home. She plays nice and gets a ring for it. We all know the story by now. What I didn't tell you before, though, is that on that very day I wrote a song... HAH! Okay, well maybe I didn't do that so much, but I did end up humming a bit and it sort of went like this:

Hum-hum-humhumhum-hum-hum, HUM HUM HUM HUMHUM, do-do, HUM HUM HUM HUM HUMHUM, do-do-do-dee-do-dee-do.

I like to consider it my own spin off of the Old Spice jingle.

What was I saying?

Oh yeah, Reese and I are in love and everyone should know it. There.

Now I'm ready for Thanksgiving.

birthday

2008-10-27T13:44:00.001-04:00

Hey.

It's mah birthday. How bout that? 26 years old and as Murphy put it in a not-so-readable txt message earlier, "the best years of my life are behind me". I seriously doubt that, but hell, whatever it takes to get Murph blocked from ever txting me again...

So my sister had her baby shower over the weekend. It was hellacious! Reese and my mom were so flustered, I could barely even move about the house comfortably. I remember sitting down to watch some ESPN pre-game, when I was comandeered to take a mess of papers to Staples and get oh, I dunno, 40 some copies of each page in this baby-program. There's four pages in the program. Four times forty... Ah, hell with it, you do the math. The precursor to this was our frantic search for a printer that functioned. My mom's got a kick ass laser printer that constantly is in need of yellow toner or an imaging drum. Go figure. So we take the pages to my aunt's printer, which is out of black ink. Nary a tear was shed before I lept out of my pillow fortress on my couch, did I offer to go to Staples. It turns out we were able to find a printer (not mentioning where) and I got to enjoy my Sunday before filming.

Yes, I mentioned filming. Partly because every four years, SUYM produces an "election" video, where we pit two rivals against one another in a heated debate sequence. It'll be just fine in a few days.

Til then, I'm gonna rock my birthday out with some sweet, Celtic tunes of olde.

my month

2008-10-23T12:59:00.001-04:00

Sweet jesus, I've lost my blogging touch.

Lots has happened since my departure from blogging a few months ago. I guess when I'm going through one of my more ashamed moments, I don't really wanna write about it. True, I did have other things that pressed me for time, but the underlying reason for my digital absence was my pride. I didn't want to have to write about the fact that I had failed to make it in Arizona. (Yes, I'm back in good, old PA) I also didn't want to have to man up and write about how I spent the better portion of August without a job.

Things ain't always pleasant.

I'm sure I'll detail more about my summer of discontent, but here's a rundown of what I've done so far:

I'm happily married
I left Arizona for two reasons - safety and homesickness
I came back to no job (Consol had enough of my shenanigans)
I spent August searching desperately for a job
I got a job as an IT Manager for a nonprofit organization (Community Action Southwest --- LOVE IT!)
Reese and I are closing on our first home in two weeks

There we go. All tied up in a nice, neat, digital bow. Since October is my birthday month (27th, send presents) jumping back into my regularly scheduled blog made sense. Also, I got to make my blog headliner into a turkey-o-lantern. I love this month, and I love this time of year.

Good fer me.

getting married

2008-07-12T00:33:00.000-04:00

This is no doubt be my last blog entry as an unmarried man.

Today at 4:00pm, EST I will wed the love of my life, LaResa. A lot of people have been asking me if I'm getting nervous or if I'm stressing. Yeah, a little stress has been creeping up on me, but besides the elope-ers, who's really got a stress-free wedding all planned out? Yah, not us. As far as nerves go, I've never been this certain about really anything before in my life. So, I can't exactly say that I'm nervous about anything. Yeah, it's a huge step in our lives, but its not one we weren't prepared to take. I'm much more nervous about moving to Tucson than I am about putting a ring on that girl's finger.

Hopefully, in little over twelve hours, the whole thing will be underway and going off without a hitch. I've never been more prepared to make this day something that Reese will remember for a lifetime. I'm destined to not screw it up. I've got a great supporting cast of groomsmen who have been with me every step of the way. I've got a lot in my to-be wife.

I'm a damn happy man right now and I'll be damn happy to have Mrs. Crockett spend the rest of her life with me. Here's to you, Reese!

child terminate

2008-07-08T11:34:00.003-04:00

One of my side-projects lately, has been to convert SUYM from its current, early 2000's state, into a more manageable, long-distance friendly web site.

While going through some configuration, I found a pretty funny setting. It makes me think of a toddler terminator.
"I'll be back... after dinner, cuz mom says..."
HAH!

free agency: so far

2008-07-07T13:51:00.001-04:00

Naslund and Kalinin are gone, having signed with the Rangers (ugh...). Jason Williams and Ladislav Nagy are the lone survivors still on my list, both all but guaranteed that they won't be Pens when the season begins. With the acquisitions of both Miroslav Satan (pronounced Shah-tan) and Ruslan Fedotenko, I seriously doubt either of my predictions from my original list will be headed to the Steel City. Satan fills the gap (but not the shoes of) Hossa created when he bolted. I always thought of Fedotenko (going back to his days with the Flyers) as a player that Ryan Malone should mirror. I firmly believe that Jordan Staal will benefit the most from Malone's departure, especially on the power play, but the Fedotenko signing certainly eases my mind if I ever worried about Bugsy leaving.

Now, my attention is turned firmly to some Finnish star - Janne Pesonen. I'm eagerly awaiting a write-up about him from some Pittsburgh-bias periodical so that I can finally get excited about him. Reports have Pesonen agreeing to terms with the Pens a few days ago, with a contract signing imminent. The important thing here is that he led the league in scoring last season. What league? Some league in Europe. Way too complicated to spell and too dulling to google. I wish there were more hype surrounding him.

My next question is what the heck is Pavol Demitra's deal? Surely he's got an offer or two after almost a week into free agency. Somebody's going to overpay for his services. I'm just glad it won't be the Pens. Hopefully it'll be somebody in the Atlantic! (heh heh heh...)

thank you, now move

2008-07-07T09:35:00.001-04:00

Okay, so its five days until the Crockett wedding goes down and I can't put my thoughts together long enough to determine if I've got all of my "groomy things" in order. (Sounds like a title to an episode of Gumby) I've tried to make a checklist, but its so damn hard... (I'm so damn lazy!) Reese says I need to write thank-you cards for the groomsmen. Yeah, just what I'd want if I were in some dude's wedding... A thank-you card. Knowing damn well that I'll be fed to the lions if I don't write them, I'll probably end up writing them tonight. I'm trying to tie in some kind of joke along with a "National Treasure-esque" style of cryptography where I'll lead the groomsmen on an incredible adventure via riddle that will ultimately end in beer. That should be fun. Time to get creative.

I also need to get three quotes from moving companies in order to get my beloved knick-knacks from here to Arizona. I need to have things moved from Oil City AND Coal Center, so I've been trying to rehearse a way to coherently relay this bit of information to the high school drop out who will undoubtedly take my phone call when I ring these moving companies. God, I hate incompetence... (Please, let me speak to somebody who can effectively translate my details into a functional move...)

missed targets

2008-07-02T13:49:00.008-04:00

I know I'm not sports/beat writer, but I find it creatively stimulating to imitate one. Like a "Crock on the Ice" segment on Channel 11 news wouldn't be the bee's knees...

Let's review my predictions:

~~Brian Rolston~~ (Devils)
~~Sean Avery~~ (Stars)
Dmitri Kalinin
Ladislav Nagy
Jason Williams

Two top-six forwards and an average defender. Still, getting two of those three wouldn't be at all bad. Though, I fail to see how signing Nagy or Williams will differ from the Ziggy Palffy signing a few years back.

Hossa signed with Detroit around lunchtime. (Completely ruined my lunch, btw.) Not that I thought he'd be back anyway... Hoped, not thought...

That leaves us with almost everyone from my "No!" list ("Fluke" Vrbata cashed in already. Guess where?). Strangely enough, an unconfirmed source reported earlier that the Pens had shown interest in the oft-injured Pavol Demitra. As talented as he may be, Ray Shero has to be aware of Demitra's inability to put together a meaningful season. Then comes the homebodies - Naslund and Jagr. Jagr wasn't even on my initial "No!" list because of how he acted on his way out of Pittsburgh. I can't imagine him wanting to come back, but then again maybe people deserve a second chance. Which is exactly what Naslund is looking for, from either Vancouver or Pitt. I'd be more inclined to take on Naslund's demeanor than Jagr's disasterpiece. I wonder what RS is thinking...

free agency: day 1

2008-07-02T08:53:00.001-04:00

So the dust has settled on day one of free agency in the NHL. Much to my chagrin, but also par for the course, several savvy veterans were well overpaid.

Topping the chart, directly from the ruins of the original "Comedy Central Blue Line" stands Michal Rozsival, a now-wealthy chronic underachiever. His new contract stands at $20 million for four years (let's see, that works out to roughly $5 million a season...) Sergei Gonchar makes $5.5 million per season. You'll excuse me if I fall ill. I'll give you one guess where he went. Right back to New York. They also overpaid for Wade Redden who will be paid similarly.

Next up, we've got two signings out of Chicago which allegedly made Warren Buffett spin in his grave. (...yeah, he's alive... I know...) Chicago is a hockey city I believe I will never understand. It seems they address their future issues a bit too soon. Remember a few years back when they tabbed Adrian Aucoin as a UFA? What did that do? Well yesterday they nabbed goalie Christobal Huet and handed him a contract to the tune of... well, nobody really knows yet, but Huet was arguably the prize goalie of free agency so you know he didn't come cheap. Unless the Blackhawks trade Nikolai Khabibulin at some point during the offseason, they're right back to having goalie 1a/1b. I have no idea why they pour so much money into this one position. You can only have ONE goalie out there at any given moment. Its not like overpaying for two will make you any better. Overpaying for two defensemen? That might work, but not for two goalies. But speaking of overpaying for a defenseman, Brian Campbell became immediate legend in the general ledgers of GM's across the league when these same Blackhawks inked him to an eight year term worth... wait for it... $7.1 million per season. (following Warren B. shortly after hearing this was Gonchar) It's a good thing Chicago has all of those superstars in their front six to help justify these two signings. (sarcasm noted)

Tampa Bay has officially inked every Penguin on the 2005-07 roster that isn't named Crosby or Malkin. One has to wonder why Brooks Orpik is still lingering.

New Jersey rolled back the clock by signing both Bobby Holik and Brian Rolston, both members of the team during the late 90's. Isn't it fun to bring the good ol' boys home? (Jagr or Naslund anybody?)

My take on this mirrors Ray Shero's: wait it out. Sure, most of the talent is off the market. That's how day one's go during free agency. RS isn't going to fail the Pens. He's going to either find a bargain somewhere, or carefully plan how he splurges. My bet is on the former, but you never know. Hossa's still available...

the pens & free agency

2008-07-01T10:45:00.003-04:00

I love this time of year. In little over an hour, the hockey world will no doubt be rocked by a wallet-fattening contract offered to a mediocre player who happened to have more shine on him than dust during the closing moments of the 2007-08 season. So goes July in hockeydom.

Most interestingly, and quite the contrary to my original predictions, Penguins GM and all-around good guy - Ray Shero - has offered contracts to each Marian Hossa and Brooks Orpik and was declined. At some point during June my gut told me that RS would have made quite an acceptable offer to one of our offseason big three (Malone, Hossa or Orpik). Now, the Pens are set see all three depart. Malone's already in Tampa, no doubt beachside drinking a tall, expensive cocktail. Hossa is expected to be the next to go, although there are still some unconfirmed rumblings that while he'll test free agency, he'll still give the Pens every chance to negotiate and may take less than he's worth to stay with a winning club. It's my experience that money can persuade in both directions, but what typically holds true in hockey is that good hockey players tend to be rich hockey players if left unsigned by July 1. The Pens aren't going to drop $7-8 million on this guy. So we'll wave a sorrowful goodbye to a heck of a hockey player. (Please, God, don't let him sign with the Rangers or Devils...)

I thought for SURE that if we didn't sign Malone or Hossa that we'd make every effort to sign Brooks. It's my opinion that the Pens could stand to lose Hossa and Malone and still be successful as long as they ponied up and offered Orpik a decent wage. Listen, the Pens have scorers. They have a fantastic farm system. They can recover from the loss of two top-six forwards. Before the Pens turned it around at about mid-season 2006-07, defense was a luxury. (Among the internet boards, the collective defense from about 2002-2006 was known as the "Comedy Central" blue line) Picture Brooks in a Sabres uniform about to unload out a thunderous hip-check on Crosby or Malkin. Things get a whole lot scarier than the mere loss of Hossa or Malone.

So now what? With those three most likely signing elsewhere, what other options do we have? The Pensblog put together a great list of free agents that may fit our system here. Here's my take on things:

First, make an effort to sign Brian Rolston. He's no Malone and certainly no Hossa, but he's a talented winger who's produced in one of the stingiest, defense-first systems in Minnesota. He's 35 years old and likely can't command the salaries our big three will.

Next, convince Sean Avery that he wants to play here. If and when the Penguins lose Laraque and Jarkko Ruutu, they all of a sudden look like pussycats. With no hulking defenseman and no lumbering, role-playing wingers, why not address the loss of a scoring threat and loss of tough guys in one move? Sure, Sean's gonna want paid. That's why I said convince.

If we need to replace Orpik, the Pens should first give a hard look at their minor-league talent, then call Dmitri Kalinin. He's no physical force, but he has some upside and he's very solid on the blue line. He'll probably come very cheap, too.

Finally, take a gamble. I'm looking at you Ladislav Nagy (you little instigator, you). He produced in Phoenix when he had some half-decent teammates (not that Phoenix was any good during his time there) but floundered on the AHL affiliate Los Angeles Kings. (Cmon, you really think Kings fans believe that they've been a true NHL team the past few years? Give me a break.) Nagy is the bona-fide high-risk, high-reward steal of free agency. (Sorry, Todd Bertuzzi) He's coming off a series of injuries that not only hampered my fantasy teams in years past, but will also hamper his quest for a lucrative contract. What's a one or two year deal going to hurt? He won't be expensive to roster and he won't be expensive to buy out if he flounders. Jason Williams should also be mentioned here. Do NOT sign both of them. It's one or the other.

Who shouldn't we sign? On the surface, Pavol Demitra looks like an interesting addition. He's a scoring winger, who can play center and could really gel with Malkin if given the chance. However, the fact that he hasn't played anywhere close to a full season since the lockout may prove that he's more risk than reward... Markus Naslund has groups in the area clammoring for a renewal of Pittsburgh marital vows. Granted he had hardly any support outside of the brothers Sedin in Vancouver, but he might be washed up. He could be an interesting pickup later in free agency, on the cheap... Oh, and GM's take note: Radim Vrbata IS a fluke...

hilarious pudding

2008-06-27T09:16:00.001-04:00

Yesterday, Josh Hall posted one heck-of-a-funny blog about the intricacies of the pudding cup over at joshuadhall. I believe we could all echo his sentiment. It's really worth the read! Bill & Ted would be PROUD.

movement

2008-06-27T08:23:00.001-04:00

I'm now going to reveal the reason why I've been keeping things so "mum" around here lately. These past two weeks have been extraordinarily busy. I've been to both Tucson and Milwaukee for job interviews. Each city was very nice and had a smattering of clever, witty and intelligent folks to pal around with. It was a pleasure to visit both. I've since been anxiously awaiting formal offers from the companies in both cities. Arizona was the first to get back to me on Tuesday (and was also my TOP choice). First, they came with a mediocre offer that I would have had to think long and hard about. It was fair, yes, but not exactly what I was looking for. So I told the nice folks out west that I'd need a day or two to think about things and I'd get back to them. No more than five or ten minutes later, my phone rings again. They had prepared a new offer, one more in line with my requirements. It still wasn't exactly what I had wanted so I told them I'd be willing to negotiate, using this offer as the starting point. As Wednesday gave way to Thursday, we bartered back and forth (mostly about the relocation package) and eventually settled on a very acceptable package that would place both Reese and I in Arizona at no cost to her or myself. I formally accepted the revised offer yesterday and put in my two-weeks-notice here at Consol.

Now, I've got even more work ahead of me. I've got to find a way to get completely moved to Tucson by the 22nd of July. Couple that with an upcoming wedding and honeymoon and I've now stepped right into "crunch time". I need three quotes from different moving companies. I need several hundred cardboard boxes or plastic totes. I need precious time to pack all of this stuff.

The bottom line? Reese and I will be gone for good as of July 22. We're certainly going to miss this area, especially all of the friends who've stuck by us so closely for the past few years. I know that we'll all remain close, though. (That's what friends do.)

No doubt that Tucson will be a life-changing adventure; one that I am wholeheartedly looking forward to.

a ton of pics?

2008-06-24T11:32:00.001-04:00

I just realized I have quite a few photographs that I really need to upload SOMEWHERE.

A month or so back, Rollo (the ever-giving) gifted me with a Flickr Pro account. I feel like I'm disrespecting him by not using it. The man spent his hard-earned rubles on it, so I should be man enough to use it. I think I'll go on a picture taking binge tonight before/after I go running.

I don't use the facebook photo albums much as I should. Most of my stuff is already on flickr and I get really lazy when I have to upload everything multiple times. I hardly use myspace for anything anymore, so I never, ever get the itch to upload anything there. Maybe I'll do the facebook / flickr combo. That sounds mainstream.

Oh! Also inspired by Rollo, I posted a link to my old, old, very old webshots album! Circa 2002-04! Peep some nostalgia.

myspace blogs

2008-06-23T15:35:00.001-04:00

I've got a million and one things to blog about but can't for reasons I won't mention just yet, I must withhold them.

What I will talk about is what's stuck in my craw. Myspace blogs. For the love of Christ, with the exception of Ted's, all I ever see in these things are how bad of a breakup last week's love interest was. Or how somebody is "has their eye on somebody special but just doesn't have the cahones to tell them straight up: I LIKE YOU". My goodness, myspace has turned into the love-notes of the information age. Whatever happened to just doing something nice for whoever you're interested in? Ever consider telling her she's got nice hair? Or maybe that you like his cologne? How bout the old stand-by --- You look very nice today.

Nope.

We'll blog until we're blue in the balls about how much you need somebody, only to turn back to your Dashboard Confessional playlist, which is undeniably set to REPEAT ALL. At least Ted keeps it interesting. I believe he once blogged about eating the heart of a pickup truck. Now THATS an entry!

Ladies & Gentlemen: We all have facets of our lives that are bigger than others at any given time. Diversify a bit! Love isn't the only thing that's bloggable! These blogs about how you can't get over an ex, or how you're so out of control that you can't fall in love are not only one-sided, they're downright sickening.

I know, I know - if I don't like these blogs, why do I read them? Hell, good question! I definitely steer clear of the posts that are share titles with various emo bands' songs. Its when they mix up the titles to indicate they may have had a change of feeling, had a good day at work, or found a friggin' nickel am I drawn into the abyss. Think they'll blog about that nickel?

Nope, again.

Every single blog is same. Can't wait for the next one!

a cold new world

2008-06-11T14:00:00.002-04:00

Got my A/C fixed! Yesterday I returned home to an uncle and an A/C man in my driveway, wrapping up their work. You know what that means? All windows shall remain closed for the foreseeable future. Thus, I won't have to deal with the feathered version of Bruce Springsteen's E Street Band ruining my morning!

So, to rejoice, I wake up an extra minute early this morning JUST so I can go upstairs and read every single article in the newspaper. I open it up, stretch a bit and peer deep into the text of Sunday's paper. Looks like mom accidentally threw away Tuesday's edition! (Thanks, mum!) So, I ask you this: Who out there does not want me to enjoy an editorial with my breakfast meal? And since when did the Sunday paper begin excluding the funnies?!?

what is this? amateur hour?

2008-06-10T10:13:00.001-04:00

I guess that blue jay from the blog entry directly below this one somehow got wind of my frustrations because early this morning, he's outside boppin' around with another, LOUDER mystery bird. Birdwatch is now at DEFCON 3.

Seriously, I have no beef with birds. I've had the pleasure of growing up around them. I have a best friend who is obsessed with them and I've even worked with them. Most of the time, they're damn nifty to be around. The thing is though, I don't work with them anymore and I will never (NEVER!) wake up next to my bird-loving best friend. So, as I see it birds shouldn't play such a huge role in my morning.

To break the situation down, this bird is more of a singer than the wren or blue jay. That's nice and all, but it seems like all of these fellas have adopted the typical karaoke train of thought: "If I can't sing well, might as well sing loud." The damnedest thing is, I can't get a bead on this bird to try and identify it. (Gotta know the enemy) I saw it boppin' around with that blue jay for just a moment when it flapped off hastily. (morning grogginess conflicts directly with bird identification) Oh it came back alright, but it was nowhere to be seen. And brother, when it came back it sure let me know it was somewhere on the porch. (my best guess is that he's a rafter-sitter...) "CHIRP-A-REE-CHIRP" over and over and over again. This dude is louder than the blue jay (who has occasionally given it a rest from time to time) but I don't see any reason to play favorites here. They each have their own shortcomings. And the final verdict always is; by their power combined, I'll never read my paper!

(Chuck, when & if you read this - 10 points if you can identify the bird.)

that bird

2008-06-09T09:03:00.001-04:00

Nothing is more annoying to me in the morning than the banter of a certain bird that insists on tweeting right outside my kitchen window.

Imagine this: You've just heard the balloon pop that ends your peaceful night of sleep and you begin yourc rawl out of bed towards your laptop alarm. You reach over, tap the trackpad twice to shut off the same song thats been waking you up to for the past year or so. You begin to stand up, shrugging off the fact that you've slept on your right arm for practically the entire night and begin the trek upstairs to get some bachelor breakfast. As you head upstairs a familiar and haunting sound grows louder. "That bird.." you grumble as you approach the top of the stairs. "HAYYYYYYYYYYY" says he. Again. And again. You look out the kitchen window as you slide some bread into the toaster. You think, "There he is, sitting on the patio fence." You know his plan. You've watched him before. Same pattern, day-in, day-out. You watch as he bops along the fence, occasionally needing a brief flight to reach his ultimate destination - the cat food. Today was no different, he chirped, bopped and ate cat food. The status-quo of the morning.

You'll excuse my surprise when I went back for my second round of toast. As I approached my breakfast corner, there was that bird perched on the ledge right outside my window. "Whoa, that's a whopper!", I thought. I guess birds around here eat well. "HAYYYYYYYYYYYY", he said again with great monotony. I shooshed him away with a quick "WHAT!", but he was back before too long - grabbing up what little cat or dog food he could before the cats could close in and make him too uncomfortable. This is how I start every morning during the spring/summer.

Just TRY to read a newspaper with a big whopper of a blue jay AND a loudmouth wren attempt their best impression of "The View" just outside my kitchen window. It ain't gonna happen.

the new and old

2008-06-03T10:43:00.000-04:00

I've had so much going on this past month, I can't possibly document it all here. I'm sure that even if I did document it here somebody would take issue with it, so I will generalize:

(The New)
First and foremost, buying a house has become less and less a priority for Reese and I. I've recently got three prospectives (yes, let's call them prospectives) from a variety of places around the lower 48. When one finally comes through for me, then we'll begin the search for a house all over again. Until then, I'm focused on the wedding and all associated expenses.

(The Old)
Chuck and I have started playing Diablo II again. This is our third stint with the game (once in high school, once early on in college, present). My all time favorite role playing / hack-and-slash game, I was ecstatic when he suggested getting back into it. World of Warcraft was a TON of fun to play, don't get me wrong, but I find it abyss-like in that the scope of the game is so massive it seems like it swallows you up. I love how expansive the game is, but its too huge for me anymore. I only have a window of three hours a night (maximum) where I can relax and just game, and three hours isn't enough to do much of anything in WoW. Not to mention the $15 per month fee that's required to play it (Diablo II is free to play online). So, we're gettin' the team back together! Rollo's joining us too this time, too! If this game is nothing more, its nostalgic and damnit, I had some damn good times playing Diablo. My passion for playing this game will never die.

Reese has an interview later in the week with a childcare establishment in Canonsburg. That's AWESOME. I know she'll knock the interview outa the park and return home with good news. I'm DAMN excited for her. She was born to mother children, and since this is as close as she's getting to that Mesopotamia - I know she'll thrive.

I'm an excitable boy, apparently.

fueling

2008-05-23T09:32:00.002-04:00

Man, the day greets me in strange ways. Sometimes it will greet me by playing a little joke on me by preventing the alarm from going off (this past Wednesday & Thursday). Other times it will greet me by being unseasonably cold in my kitchen. More frequently, my mornings have been riddled with climbing gas prices.

On my drive to work the first thing I see just before I get on the highway is the giant sign for Pilot, a gas station in Bentleyville. I always look to it just before I get on route 70 because its one of the cheaper gas stations in the area as it takes about a day or so longer for them to raise gas prices. Lately, though, they've been right on the ball. Within this week I've seen the price of gas jump from $3.75 to $3.99. That's a real bummer for everyone, especially those of us who are comically underpaid. Watching a Today interview with Jim Cramer (you know, the "Mad Money!" guy) he speculates that only when gas climbs to $6.00 per gallon will we see any kind of drastic change that could alter the demand for gas - and thusly drive price downward again.

(Later in my trip to work, I managed to find a station that was still @ $3.89, so I filled up there this morning. $44.00! And I drive a Caliber!)

I definitely remember the days where I would call my mom from the Crossroads in Richeyville and tell her to get there ASAP because fuel was only $1.34/gallon. I know this is stating the obvious, but man, we're never gonna see those days again. One thing is certain: I've never envied Prius owners more.

inhaling

2008-05-20T14:33:00.002-04:00

For whatever reason, I'm more dependent on my inhaler this year than I have been in recent years. My asthma usually grips me pretty well about halfway through a run. Its typically very manageable, albeit very uncomfortable. As is the status quo of summertime, I gradually increase my cardio workload and ultimately deal with more breathing complications. I've never had a bona fide "attack" (I thank my lucky stars) so I'm not particularly worried that increasing my workout duration also ups my risk . Sure, I'll use my inhaler after I'm done running - that's just the way its been for me. It wasn't until a week or so ago that I noticed that compared to last year, I'm hitting the thing like a water bottle. Every single time I'm at Rotary, I'm sucking gas (say it fast enough and it sounds like I'm sucking ass... heh...)

I've decided that in order to turn this thing back into a manageable condition, I've gotta find ways to lay off the aerosol. A few years ago, when I ran into this problem on a much smaller level, I just forgot about the inhaler altogether. I found other ways to work through it. I'd increase my cool down times, do some "inhaler-like" exercises and try my best to control it. Granted, that was a much lesser instance, but it still worked. I'll try to manage it on my own.

Now, the biggest question of all is "why?" Why, all of a sudden, am I succumbing to asthma more and more often? I'm in pretty good shape. Not like I was a few years ago, but still I'm definitely not lethargic and lardy. So it can't be anything physical, right? I'm not allergic to anything, so that's definitely not an issue. Is the pollen count up? (Will somebody PLEASE TELL ME IF THE DAMN POLLEN COUNT IS UP!?!?) Even if it is, that's never really been a flare factor. Ozone action days are at least another month-and-a-half away. The weather has been pretty nice, besides. My only other thought involves my living quarters. I live in a basement where a dehumidifier has been running since about 7th grade. When we got central A/C a few summers ago, there was no need to run the dehumidifier because the A/C acts as its own dehumidifier. (Lucky me! a two-fer!) When winter rolls around, the air in the house is so dry that the dehumidifier's effort is wasted when left running. So I stowed it away in a corner. My mom's a sharp lass. At the first sign of spring she's usually the first one to dehumidify anything (I'm looking at you, dryer). So for about a month now, I've been living in a rain forest equivalent. Maybe that's whats affecting my breathing. I figured this much out a few nights ago and victoriously switched the dehumidifier ON. I fully believe my breathing problem will be corrected soon.

wishing

2008-05-20T10:51:00.001-04:00

One last thing before I conclude my blog about the Atlanta sessions. I really wish I had stayed until Saturday evening. I had every option to do so before I scheduled this training course, but I figured I'd rather be home on Friday than stuck in the south for another day. Saturday was Atlanta's "Beerfest". Over 240 beers on tap, $20 admission, courtesy shuttle service to anywhere in the Atlanta area (for DD concerns) and the proceeds go to charity. So not only did I miss out on sampling some fine brews, I could have destroyed my liver while helping out the less fortunate.

I'm trying to go back in a couple of weeks, though I won't expect to do any Beerfesting. Maybe something just as cool will crop up.

remaining

2008-05-19T08:43:00.001-04:00

I've finally reached a point in my day where I can sit down and collect some thoughts. Time to further document my Atlanta trip.

On the first day I showed copious amounts of confidence in my Garmin, that I left my suite five minutes before class started. According to my GPS, I was three minutes away from the training building. I was never one to turn down fashionably late entrance either. Fifteen minutes later and I'm still searching for the training center. How on earth can this building be so difficult to find!?! Well, the address on the training sheet didn't specify that I'd be at the Wells-Fargo building (after all, I was training with KDC - NOT Wells-Fargo). When I put it all together, I figured that the Wells-Fargo building probably houses several other businesses (it did) and joined the class fifteen minutes into the formalities. It truly wasn't a big deal, but for a while there I thought I'd never find this place.

As the days went on, I made some good friends. Martin was the "wifi guy" from Haascnc in Oxnard, CA. Funny guy! He and I developed quite a knack for solving exercises during the class. I also met some homebodys. Sergio and Mike were from Pittsburgh, working for Bayer. Two good guys. Sergio was actually on my flight back to the 'Burgh. We were delayed well over two hours for our return flight. It was good to have a friend to talk to then.

The shopping in Atlanta was pretty good too. Nothing was too far away from where you were at any given moment. The only real gripe I had was when I needed to kill some time, I couldn't find a nearby theatre. Everything was 5+ miles away, with a trip on the toll road necessary. Sorry, but I had to pass. I had already stretched my expense account as it was, so I didn't need additional expenses even if it was only fifty cents.

I also came to some frightening (and relieving) conclusions about my career in Atlanta, which I'll disclose in a later blog.

enjoying

2008-05-18T10:31:00.000-04:00

I really should have blogged more while in Atlanta. First off, I thoroughly enjoyed my flight both there and back. I couldn't believe how beautiful things look when you're 30,000+ feet in the air. Incredible.

While in Atlanta I stayed quite busy. Training took over my entire day. Shopping took over most of my nights. On the first night there, I went to the Perimeter Mall and hit up a sports shoppe for a few gifts for Reese. I got her a Braves shot glass (for the collection) and a Braves jersey with her favorite player, Brian McCann, on the back. She wore it all day yesterday.

Some other things I liked about Atlanta: Roads were abundant and went where you thought they would go. With 12-lane highways damn near everwhere you looked, traffic wasn't bad either. The city was beautiful, with few "older looking" constructions. In fact, while driving on route 400 I noticed a ton of cranes putting up new buildings. You just don't see that around here.

Argh. It's kind of hard to put my thoughts together while I have a cat meowing in my ear... I'll be back later.

flying

2008-05-11T07:55:00.001-04:00

First, I'd like to congratulate my fiancee - Reese - for graduating college yesterday. Well done!

In a few short hours I'll be taking my first flight ever. I'm not exactly sure what to expect. Obviously when it comes to this whole process, I'm a little green. The whole check-in / security process seems a bit much. I certainly understand why there's a need for it, I just can't seem to get directions as to where I need to be and how I have to do these things. What goes in the little bins while I'm going through security? I can carry what on? What goes through the x-ray thing? I expect a baptism by fire coupled with frustratingly long wait times for those unfortunate enough to get in line behind me.

I wonder if I've got a window seat. I wonder what the heck I'm gonna do for damn near two hours on the plane. I wonder how chaotic it will be when I arrive in Atlanta. I wonder how accurate my itinerary is.

I'll follow up at some point in Atlanta. Peace outtttttttt!

rocking

2008-05-07T13:58:00.001-04:00

I love wikipedia and rock bands from Switzerland.

I think if I were to describe my life, to this point, using only the titles of rock albums - I would use every album ever made by Krokus. Just the titles! Also included in my thinking are their EP's and live compilations.

I can identify a point in my life where I can relate an album title to what I was doing or how I was feeling. For instance, "Round 13" could have been the time where I lived life as if I was on a drinking binge and it was Round 13. (Ah, the college years...) Another good example would be my current train of thought - "To Rock or Not to Be" - which to me means you either rock or you cease to exist. That's good enough for me. Hell, "Metal Rendez-vous" describes how I spend each and every Wednesday. (Metallica Wednesdays) I've got one more for ya, then I'll stop. Their single "Let the Love Begin" can represent my impending marriage. I'm sure that will rock as much as Krokus does.

deterring

2008-05-07T11:23:00.001-04:00

Yep. Yesterday's house hunting adventure was over well before it started.

I thought I had found a hell of a bargain - a twenty year old, split-level entry in the McDonald area for around 90 G's. It turned out that I wasn't the only potential buyer who thought so! In a matter of a single day, the house went from available to contingent. That means, somebody slapped a fat offer on it and now the home has to merely pass an inspection before its off the market. To captain fat-wallet, I say "good form". You've beaten me to what looked like a heck of a deal. I only wish I had seen that property sooner, then maybe the tables would be turned! Enjoy your new house, ya louse.

But all isn't lost right? After all, I mentioned that there were two houses to see this week right? Guess again! The only other house within a twenty mile radius that interested me also got scooped up that very same yesterday. What kind of crap luck is this? Not that I'd had my heart set on either of these homes, but sheesh! Those two homes must have been awfully nice to get yanked right out from under my embryonic interest.

This leads us back to our original interest, the Cape Cod style home in Blainsburg. I'm becoming more and more accepting of its few flaws as the hours pass, but I've also come up with a few questions. Is there any township ordinance that would prevent me from having a bonfire there? If I were to need surgery on my knee at some point, would I be able to climb the stairs each time nature called? Which part of the house would I focus on when I decided to renovate/add-on? I guess I'd be a lot more comfortable with this place if it just had a bathroom on the main level. (Did I just answer my last question?)

Now that we've just about exhausted our options for the immediate area, does anybody have any recommendations when it comes to a good living area? We only have one more home on our radar, and could use some suggestions. We're looking for an area where the property taxes are low, public water is available and where children can grow up in a safe neighborhood. (I'd prefer something with a relatively private yard) While we're at it, does anybody have any dirt on Blainsburg? I've known several close friends who've grown up there, and they seem to be alright, so I can't immediately discount it as our new home.

Any suggestions, about anything at all are warmly welcomed.

househunting

2008-05-06T13:52:00.001-04:00

I think for the rest of the month, I'm going to title my posts ending in "-ing". A few years ago, the band Boys Night Out did this kinda thing on their (awesome) album Trainwreck. I figure that following in their footsteps will help me become a more awesome album.

Reese and I saw three houses on Sunday, for two reasons: first and foremost, we NEED A FRIGGIN HOUSE. Secondly, we needed to avoid the Pens game in order for them to win. Whatever our hunch, it just felt like if we did that, we'd be sitting in the Eastern Conference Finals a week from now. Well, ho HO! Look where the Pens are! GO PENS.

Uhhhhhh, oh yeah, the houses. This might start to shift into the "three little pigs" --- just a warning. The first house - made of hay - sure seemed as much. It was a big, old country farmhouse that had a few (more like VERY few) renovations done in 2001. I quite clearly remember driving by this house back in high school and wondering what they were adding on, so at very least this placated my curiosity. The house is nice enough from the outside, it was big and white and could stand to have some siding re-done, but nothing major. The inside is another story, though. When you enter the place, you walk through a sun-room that's pointing directly at a huge hillside; receiving absolutely no sun whatsoever at any point during the day. There is a small hallway leading from that sun room into the kitchen with what looks like a closet directly to the right in the hallway. This "closet" turned out to be a full bathroom. It kind of made me chuckle. "A full bathroom between the kitchen and the back door. HEH!" The kitchen was a definite Rollo-slayer. The ceiling was little over a foot taller than myself, not totally uncomfortable, but you could definitely tell that somebody paid a handyman poorly to convert an old porch into a large kitchen. Poor Rollo would end up wedged in there somehow and we'd never see him again. I can't live in a house that outright refuses my friends due to height. There was a fairly sized dining room and living room off of the kitchen that were nice enough, but the real kicker happened when you walked upstairs. This house was marketed as a three-bedroom home. The master bedroom was okay, just big enough to fit my crap and it had its own private full bath. We found another bedroom not far away, but locked down tight by some distrustful fourth-grader who apparently thought I was out to get his "Ameri-thon" trophies. I never had an opportunity to swipe any... But the home owner tried to pass off a common area upstairs as a third bedroom. There was no privacy, no wall, just large, open, un-carpeted area. Particle board flooring and all. That was the deal breaker right there. It was a real bummer too, as the yard was huge, the acreage was massive and the two-car garage reminded me of the times when Ted, Rollo and I would just chill in his garage and drink til we couldn't see anymore. On to house #2!

House #2 was in the middle of Cal, something I thought was cool. It was a true three-bedroom house with a large, flat yard, a garage and off street parking. The front door opens into an absolutely MASSIVE living room that had Reese and I drooling from the time we stepped into the place. The dining room was huge too. Each had 12 foot ceilings and had plenty of sunlight due to well placed windows. The kitchen was an anomaly. It had "floating counters" that you could move around the room as you saw fit to arrange. The fridge stuck out like a boner in spandex. The oven didn't have a vent, instead relied on a 1950's style vent fan that was built into the wall. The weirdest part was the only full bath in the place was built right onto the kitchen. Much like the last house, I found this strange but I could probably deal with it. After all, up until here the house was wonderful. Going upstairs changed everything. The floors were the original linoleum tile covered distastefully by pieces of loose carpeting. The tile was peeling in many places, and the walls were all original. The rooms were sickeningly small and the whole "look & feel" reminded me of a lifetime movie set in the 1970s where a redhead kid would be abused by his stepfather. There was also a small bathroom up there too, but the toilet was smack in the corner and left NO room for your right leg if you had to drop a deuce. The house also came with a dilapidated, flat-roof garage that really didn't have a roof as it was busy caving in on itself. On the bright side, the yard was my favorite part of this house. Big, flat and easily maintained. Unfortunately, I'm not a buffalo and I won't be living on a plain. Onto house #3.

Reese loved this house from the minute she walked in it. Its a nice cape-code style home with a ton of updates. The living room reminds me of the one I had when I lived in my old house in Cal, which immediately won me over. It has a huge, open foyer which leads to a revolving staircase. Also on the main level is a large master bedroom (bonus for me!). There's an incredibly large dining room that's just off the kitchen. Now, speaking of the kitchen, here's where the house bums me out. The kitchen is small. Quite possibly one of the smallest I've ever seen. This really isn't a problem (I'd just knock out the wall separating the dining room, add some counter space and a breakfast bar and combine the two rooms) but it IS additional work and I'll have to save - quite possibly for years - before I could do any of this. Another bummer was the bathroom setup. Going upstairs, the bathroom greets you as the first door on the left. Its got a tub and a crapper, but no shower (again which is fine) but as I'm doing my thorough inspection of the bathroom - I notice that there's NO electrical outlets in there. That won't sit so well with Reese, who I know won't want to blow dry her hair in another room (and really, she shouldn't have to). So, if there's no shower here, and no shower on the main level, you can guess where its at. That's right, its in the basement - right next to the washer & dryer. Yessss... Finally something I'm not keen on. So, add another full bathroom needing added onto this house at some point as well (more money... ugh...). The upstairs bedrooms are well sized, and if my genes cooperated, it could easily house a boy and two girls (or vice versa). Back to the basement, it is rather nice with high ceilings and with the potential to be finished eventually. The basement extends into a single car garage, which I'd probably seal off and make a bar or family room. I can build a better garage... I have the technology... The power... wait... back to the house... The yard is a postage-stamp equivalent. This is a corner lot, so its pretty large with a private alley in the back for additional parking. The house also has an incredible view of beautiful, downtown Brownsville. (That's supposed to be a feature?) It is the only house to have electric heat (both baseboard and heat-pump) which will help us save an incredible amount of money. So yes, we like this house and we're prepared to make an offer on it.

We've got two more houses to see, one tonight and one later in the week. My big beef with these houses (aside from the obvious) is the lack of yards. I'd like to be able to have a fire-pit or bonfire area at my house. Of course that won't be a deal breaker, but I'm so sick of always having to set my mom at ease before I can invite people a bonfire.

Crossing my fingers.

goodbye ultimate, hello hockey

2008-05-02T13:46:00.001-04:00

As yet another semester winds down (and I've seen my fair share of semesters winding down) I'll close another successful chapter of Cal U Ultimate and begin my preparations for a summer filled with roller hockey. During my lunch break, I made the smooth transition into hockey season by buying some much needed hockey equipment. It's been a few years since I've needed to completely re-equip myself, so I'm happy that I'm only shelling out hockey equipment money on a semi-annual basis. Long story short, the last time I made a major equipment purchase was 2002/03 when I bought some nice composite sticks and a pair of rollerblades. Towards the end of last season, my sticks splintered at the base, rendering them useless. I also tore an eye-hole right out of the leather in my left boot, but managed to skate around it (heh).

So I got new blades and a couple of sticks. I sort of feel like Jordan Staal due to the magnitude of stick that I now wield. Its MUCH taller than my last few sticks. What's more, is that I'm going to need to get used to my new rollerblades quickly. I've got about a ten minute warm up before the game starts on Saturday, and I'll need every minute of it. New skates are awesome, but they take some getting used to.

I've also made some preliminary decisions as to how I'm going to train this summer. I think I'm going to go back to doing a lot of wind sprints rather than doing distance running like I did last year. I'm also going to incorporate some cardio on the stairs outside of the student union. It worked for Curtis Martin in 2004. I've been doing sets of lunges across Rotary, and they've helped incredibly with my short-term stamina - I'm definitely keeping those! Maybe I'll finally own up and get a bicycle too, so I can vary my cardio a little more. Man... I can't wait til it gets unbearably hot out. Thats' what I live for!

van halen

2008-05-01T09:17:00.001-04:00

Last night I had the pleasure of witnessing the best concert I've ever seen before in my life. Van Halen more than put on a show, they ran a clinic. From Eddie's fantastic guitar to DLR's wild outfits to Wolfgang's youthful antics - this concert found the proper balance between showmanship and music. What made it even better was that the whole band just let loose, goofed around and looked like they were having an amazing time. It was exactly what I had pictured. That's how bands are supposed to perform. This was, quite honestly, the first concert I've seen where each member of the band was there to perform first, have fun second and just cut loose. Each member had a pretty good idea as to what the other was thinking / going to do next, but not because of rehearsal. You could tell that the obvious bond they all shared was driving the show more than mere camaraderie. They didn't pause frequently to tell meaningless, made-up stories and try to force feed us bad comedy. (Although, the two tales that DLR told were hilarious.)

The biggest part of the night, at least for me, was when they played Panama. If you know me well, you'll know that during "Crock's Bullshit Minute" (a part of the Crock & Murph in the Morning podcast) I play Panama in the background to let you know I mean business. Well, last night, EVH and company too meant business. They brought down the house by jumping straight from the already incredible Panama to a wild guitar solo by Eddie that led directly into Ain't Talkin' Bout Love. The order of these songs couldn't have been more perfect for my crew as (obviously) I was there to hear Panama and Rollo was there to hear Ain't Talkin' Bout Love.

Yeah man, it was an incredible night.

I'll get around to recapping April eventually (I think), but until I do - go wild with the very Spanish, very loco, Cinco-de-Mayo blog headliner!

(not the) april recap

2008-04-30T09:45:00.002-04:00

It's well overdue, so before I get into my monthly summation of all things Crock, I'm going to overuse commas while describing last weekend.

The Cal U Ultimate Frisbee team traveled two and a half hours north to Tionesta, a small time town with big time trees. Here, we shacked up with Tyler's parents, who own a motel, and very graciously put us up for two nights. Saturday saw us stroll into Clarion to take on the only two teams who showed up for this tourney. We did very well, winning both games as a Cal U team. After our wins, we were treated to a "hat tournament" where every one's name goes into a hat and teams are assembled in the "pick em" fashion. There were about six of us who were accidentally left out of the hat (myself included) so I ended up on my good friend Eric's team. Without going into much detail, I'm sad to inform you that our team didn't fare so well. A lot of memories were forged during those games we played as a "hat team". Most are forgettable! Towards the end of the hat tourney a mighty rain squall rolled through and forced us indoors for about an hour. We resumed frisbee activities and continued our now famed losing streak. Heidi and Ali were the mudpuppies of the afternoon, finally making good on their promise to mud wrestle (sort of).

That night, we kicked off the festivities with a game called "WAH!" - a traditional frisbee game which we quickly turned into a drinking game. Instead of sitting out whenever you messed up, you simply drank and were able to keep playing. It added a certain mystique to the game that is rivaled only by beer pong or maybe circle of death. What a fun way to kick off a night. After dusk settled and we were all WAH'd out, we chilled around the campfire for a bit until the night peaked when some skinny dipping went down. Shortly thereafter, we called it a night.

Sunday, the remainder of the team that stayed the extra night went to a state park near Tionesta. We talked as we walked along the trail and Reese took some killer pictures. (see my facebook until I flickr them) We hit two trails, nearly completing both of them. Jokes were plentiful and the times were amazing. Looking back, I couldn't think of a better way to round out our last tournament of the semester. Later that night, we returned home to elect new officers and get some paperwork ready for the fall semester.

This Friday, I'm hosting a bonfire for the team. Can't wait.

Monthly recap coming later today. Stick around.

clarion frisbee tournament

2008-04-25T09:03:00.003-04:00

This weekend's going to be creative and fun. Our final frisbee tournament will be hosted hosted by Clarion (2+ hours due north) on Saturday. What's creative about this tourney is that after all the playoffs are settled, they're hosting a "hat tournament" where everyone's name, from every school attending, goes into a hat and teams are assembled by drawing names. We've never had an opportunity to do this in the past, so it'll be interesting to see how it turns out.

Backtracking just a bit, Tyler's (frisbee teammate who has completely written off microwaves and now uses power chords from his axe to warm his food) parents own a motel/livery and have invited the entire frisbee team to stay there for the weekend. Honestly, this is one of the most generous offers I've seen extended to the team. His parents are saving us from having to wake up at 5:00am on Saturday and drive 2+ hours. Instead, we'll be well rested and (with any luck) bushy-tailed. So, we'll be leaving tonight after I get off work and we plan on staying until Sunday afternoon. By the sounds of things, there's lots to do up there. We've got hiking, kayaking, and (of course) frisbee on the itinerary. I really can't thank his parents enough for this. Amazing.

I assume I'll be back by Sunday afternoon/evening, not that I'm particularly excited about returning. This will not only be the last tournament of the semester, but it may be last time I'll play on the same team as good friend Eric. He's been around since we started the frisbee team, and he's somebody I've really connected with both on and off the field. While learning the game, we pretty much progressed at the same pace, shared the same intensity and practiced together hard - especially during the "battle drill". I can't picture a practice or game without him there. Hopefully, he'll come back and play in tournaments after he graduates. However things end up, I absolutely want to make this tournament one to remember.

IUP frisbee tournament

2008-04-21T11:19:00.002-04:00

100_0068
Originally uploaded by California Ultimate Frisbee

I'm definitely satisfied with how this past weekend went. The Cal U Ultimate Frisbee team played hard at a very difficult, very fun IUP tournament. We may have only won once, but I really believe that we learned a lot (especially from the game against IUP, who gave us a crash course in how to run the zone defense well).

I believe Keebs said it best during our last game when he remarked that "A lot of inexperienced players are playing some amazing frisbee right now." While that held true for that game, it really was the sentiment for the entire tourney. We came out of the gates flying around, playing our own game and lost our first two games by a combined three points.

Bringing things into a more personal view, Reese and I stayed overnight in some dude's house on Saturday night. Our hosts were cool as hell, but I had to sleep on the floor. (They had converted their third bedroom into a walk-in closet with a small, bench-style bed and a bureau.) Needless to say, I'm glad to be home. Though, I had some great trouble getting to sleep last night as I couldn't help but relive it all. Excellent weekend.

interesting set of pics

2008-04-18T10:33:00.001-04:00

Ferris Wheel
Originally uploaded by Jalebe

I never knew about an abandoned theme park at Chippewa Lake Park. The entire park is being overtaken by nature. It's been abandoned for over thirty years now, and apparently will be completely demolished for redevelopment.

I think these pics are some of the coolest I've seen in a while. I'd definitely like to explore this place. Click on the picture to view the whole set. There's rollercoasters, concession stands and other creepy stuff!

the digital meal

2008-04-18T09:11:00.002-04:00

(After typing and rereading this blog entry, I noticed how each paragraph was a separate, single, digestible portion of thought. It led me to think, "Wow, if I could eat any part of the internet right now, I'd definitely wanna eat this blog entry. So, I've labeled each paragraph as a course of my digital meal. A word of advice regarding meals - don't make the meal if you can't buy the groceries yourself.)

(to start, an appetizer)
Another note about contemporary music, Louis XIV has a single called "Air Traffic Control" that's getting some major airplay on Sirius 21 - Alt Nation. When I first heard Louis XIV (pronounced Louie the Fourteenth) I thought this band sounded similar to most other Brit-Punk/Alternative bands. I guess they do a lot of work with their vocals to sound different, because it was only today that I found out they hail from San Diego. Air Traffic Control sort of reminds me of Radiohead's "Karma Police", so maybe that's why I had assumed they were from across the pond. Regardless, Air Traffic Control is definitely worth a listen, especially if you were into Karma Police. Louis XIV's song isn't quite as dark as Radiohead's, but it shades well. I'd definitely like to hear more from Mr. 14th.

(napkin the hands/face)
Alright. Enough about music.

(bring on the first course)
This weekend puts me at IUP for two days to participate in an Ultimate Frisbee tourney with the Cal U team. Unlike the previous two tournaments, the weather for this event seems to be cooperating. That means when Monday rolls around, I'll have something else to write about instead of bitching about how rain ruined yet another set of weekend plans.

(toughin' out the second course w/ side salad)
On the college front, there's only a few more weeks of class left in the semester and I'm kind of sad to see it go. I've programmed myself to operate at full collegiate learning capacity on Mondays and Thursdays, and losing that over the summer will no doubt cause me all kinds of grief during the first few weeks of the fall semester. And although I'm only taking two classes, I'm doing quite well in them, so replicating the results from the Spring will be my main goal when Fall finally arrives. I really did enjoy my first semester as a graduate student. Learning something that I have little experience with keeps me interested while the university's mandate of a "B average" in prerequisite classes has me sharply focused. Really, I haven't been this focused on my studies since my sophomore year in high school.

(make room for the third course)
Yesterday, I got into twittering. (You can see my twitter updates to the right --->) I'm not entirely sure what kind of benefits this service will add to my digital life, but I'm willing to give anything a try. Twitter seems like a "Facebook Status" website that was blown way out of proportion. The authors of many blogs I frequent use it fairly often, though. Maybe this will help me connect with them. Maybe it will fall by the wayside.

(and dessert)
Oh, and how about those Pens!!?!?!
Go.
Pens.

kodak m763

2008-04-16T14:48:00.001-04:00

Around lunchtime yesterday I decided I've had it with my old digital camera (HP Photosmart 435 - a zoomless clunker of a camera) and needed to purchase the camera I've had my eye on for about a week now. So, also on my lunch break yesterday, I went to Best Buy and readied myself to buy the camera. There was a real problem though; Best Buy seems to lack floor people during the lunch hour on Tuesdays. So for little under twenty minutes I'm double-checking my price comparisons versus similar cameras and their accessories, assuming that if I look confused enough that SOMEBODY would come along and offer to assist me. No such luck. I left as I had arrived - without a camera.

Forward to an hour and a half ago. Best Buy is now fully stocked with floor representatives. (Tuesdays must be the "call off sick day" or "lets all go eat at Friday's day") As luck would have it, I immediately was greeted by a stout young gentleman who looked more irritated about working during the lunch hour than he was about his weight. (If you can't read into that, he was heavy-set... come to think of it, maybe today is "lets all go eat at Friday's day" and he got left behind...) I told him to stick around, as I was checking out the prices on memory cards and was heading for the camera next. Getting this thing a day later than I had wanted wound up being a splendid trip down Serendipity Lane. Just today one of the 4GB ($27) cards went on sale for a mere $5 more than the 2GB ($22) card of the same brand. (Now THATS a deal!) The floor rep then hooked me up with my camera (the Kodak M763) and I was on my way. For the rest of my lunch break, I read the manual and played with it a bit. (Don't wanna go ruining an investment)

I'll need this camera in the upcoming months since Reese & I are so intent on building our home and I'd like to document everything that I possibly can during the process. I also haven't been taking pictures regularly since about 2005. That will all change now.

music notes

2008-04-16T09:27:00.002-04:00

Just a few music-related thoughts for your Metallica Wednesday. (Time to hit your Metallica playlist, hard!)

First, has anybody noticed how tight Avenged Sevenfold's guitar licks are? They seriously are taking me back to the days when Metallica was rocking my world with explosive guitar riffs. Their song - "Critical Acclaim" has an amazing intro where both guitars mirror one another. Its awesome.

I'm not afraid to admit I'm a fan of Panic at the Disco. I thoroughly enjoyed their "A Fever You Can't Sweat Out" album and even though their newest disc "Pretty. Odd." deviates from their original sound, I still enjoy it. This album sounds much more light-hearted and fun than their first.

I'm not so sure what's going on with Deathcab for Cutie. I haven't had the opportunity to listen to their entire new disc - "Narrow Stairs" - but I did manage to hear their first single and it's definitely not what I expected. "I Will Possess Your Heart" doesn't follow the typical, witty, poetic style of lyrics that are on the Transatlanticism or Plans albums. They've been very open about how they weren't going for the same sound from their last two albums. I'm not saying its a bad thing, yet. I'm just not used to Deathcab sounding like this. Maybe it'll be a good change?

A few days ago, I was reading Weezer's official website and they're being deceptively concrete about their upcoming album. They've recently confirmed the drop date of the album (6/24) but they're being slightly coy about the remaining details. Word on the street is that the album will be their third self titled album, this time the color theme being red - becoming known as "The Red Album". I've always said that Weezer's best songs came from their "color" albums (save a few from Pinkerton, which was kind of like a color album, right?) so I'm definitely looking forward to this release. At least Weezer has confirmed their first single "Pork & Beans" which was written as a result of Rivers' becoming pissed off over a meeting where he was told write songs differently. I hear that we're going to be getting Pork & Beans airplay in little under a week. I can't wait to hear it!

Unrelated to music, but just as important - the Pens can sweep the Sens tonight with a win. GO PENS!@!#@!

liquor stories vol. 1

2008-04-15T10:52:00.002-04:00

This past Saturday, Chuck, Reese and I ventured to South Hills Village to get Chuck fitted for his tux. (I am, always have been, and will ever remain his ride) So he gets fitted for a tux in record time, and we peruse the mall. I buy my obligatory "shirts on-sale" from Aero. Reese conquered a candy store. All the buyin' worked us up a mean hunger, so we went to the Olive Garden where I was reunited with a former love - balsamic vinegar. (I dined on jelly beans and salad) After our meal, Chuck pointed out a large liquor store. He wanted to pick up some juice for his old man. I originally thought I'd just do some window shopping, since I'm not much of a liquor drinker anyway. Fate again reunited me with another former love. This time, it was Black Velvet.

My favorite section of a liquor store is where the rum/gin/vodka/whiskey/tequila collide. If I were to make hay at a state store, this is where I'd do it. (Now, friends - a tale) I was in a whiskey mood. But, for whatever reason when it comes to whiskey I can't really stand JD or Jim Beam. I think its because they've both got a nasty bite right after you finish shooting it. To me, drinking that stuff sort of makes me feel like I'm using industrial-strength rubbing alcohol as mouthwash. (and... uhh.. I get COMPLETELY out of control when I drink that stuff. Almost left that out...) Its a different story when it comes to Black Velvet. If I could choose one word to describe Black Velvet, it would be "smooth". There's no harsh bite at the end. No shrill aftertaste of industrial biohazard. As far as I'm concerned, it's all good. I still get a bit out of hand, but that comes with the territory. Anyway, back to the liquor store. They're having a sale on this stuff! Typically, fifths of it can be sold anywhere between the $8.99 - $9.99 range. (not bad) The markdown was an entire dollar! I'll take your $8.00 whiskey.

Later that night, Reese, Rollo and I are drinking in my kitchen. I'm three glasses deep and I'm getting a bit out of hand. That's the beauty of a nightcap, though. If I feel I'm headed down the wrong path to sobriety, I can always crash on the couch and watch a movie with Reese and Rollo.

The moral of the story? "There Will Be Blood" is a DAMN good movie.

rainchecks and home sites

2008-04-11T10:30:00.001-04:00

Last weekend the Cal U frisbee team saw our road trip and tournament at Juniata washed away by rain, forty-two hours before game time. That's a real crumb on your bumper considering I was going to be gone an entire weekend for nothing other than throwing a disc. Oh well, live for the next weekend I guess. So, as of tomorrow "next weekend" will be "this weekend" and yet another tournament has been foregone. This time, its due to lack of participation. Six teams were tabbed as the minimum number for the tournament to be held --- three teams RSVP'd. Yet another bummer. Next weekend we have a tournament at IUP. I've rarely seen a tourney canceled there, so I'm going to be as up as I can be for this thing. Following the tourney at IUP, I understand that Cal will be hosting a home tourney. Spring weather is some of the most volatile weather of the year, but damnit they can't ALL be canceled, can they?

My uncle recently gave Reese and I a vote of confidence when I finally got around to asking him about his opinion regarding my desire to build a house. I was quite surprised when he agreed with our decision to build on the hill, up above my parents' house. I seriously thought his response would be more along the lines of "trying to talk me out of it". Now that we've got the initial discussion out of the way, my uncle, Reese and I will walk up to our proposed home site. Once he gives me to OK to get it surveyed, I'm going to try to steamboat through this thing and hopefully have a house built in time for winter.

workin' for mba

2008-04-08T09:33:00.000-04:00

I'm enrolled at Cal U to get my MBA... Or so I thought.

A few days ago, Chuck and I were shootin' the shit about his degree and what his plans were. It came up that he might consider getting his MBA from Indiana University of Pennsylvania. That seemed a bit odd, seeing as how Cal offered the same thing and wouldn't require a move. He then set me straight. If you go to this website, you'll see the complete description of the MBS program at Cal (the program in which I'm currently enrolled). Now, I know it makes no mention of the term "MBA" anywhere in there, but to a dude who has an undergraduate degree in IT - it looked just the same. I'm pretty green when it comes to business education, and you'd think that after talking with my adviser and many administrative types, that SOMEBODY would have set me straight. Not Cal, though. They let me meander on, never correcting me. I must have looked pretty foolish talking to administration, faculty and my adviser. Now I've nearly completed my first semester here, and I wonder if I've done it all for nothing.

Chuck and I continued talking. I told him my primary reason for attending Cal U was because it made the most economical sense to me. Since I graduated there, I didn't have to take the GMAT or the GRE exams, thus eliminating exam fees. It wasn't far from home, so I'd be using little gas (and also decreasing my carbon footprint). Their tuition is affordable, and their activity fees are reasonable. While my plight still remains purely economical, my choices aren't as exciting as I'd like to envision them. Chuck told me that there are plenty of "distance learning" programs that would allow me to earn my MBA from home. This is all well and good, except these types of programs are typically several hundred dollars more per-credit-hour. For example, Cal has a per-credit-hour fee of $327.00 for graduate students. Not bad at all. In contrast, two schools I've briefly explored almost double Cal U's tuition. Regis University offers a distance learning MBA program at $750.00 per-credit-hour. Capella University tops off at $605.00 per-credit-hour. Neither make financial sense to me.

So now I'm left with several questions. The foremost being: What's the biggest difference between the two degrees? I'm actually surprised by the lack of GOOD articles on the web regarding this! I managed to find this article, and it really didn't do a good job explaining the differences between the two degrees. This is what I took from it: "the academically inclined often pursue the MBS while career-oriented individuals value the prestige of an MBA". Well great. What the hell does that mean? I need the meat and potatoes of this discussion and they gave me a side salad. What can I do with an MBA that I couldn't do with an MBS? And vice versa! Is there some kind of ceiling I'll hit if I stick with the MBS, that somehow doesn't exist to those who have obtained an MBA? And will an MBA be completely useless in ten years after anybody with access to the internet and a high school diploma can obtain one? Why can't I find the answers to these questions?

All I know is that I'm career-driven, so does that automatically mean I should be pursuing an MBA and not an MBS?

frisbee impact!

2008-04-07T11:07:00.001-04:00

I guess there's just no substitute for good, hard competition when it comes to exercise. I consider myself to be a borderline running fanatic. I'll run if I'm bored. I'll run if I'm not bored. I'll run in the rain. I'll run in the snow. (I will eat it in a box, I will eat it with a fox...) You get the picture. Saturday I played my first truly competitive game of Ultimate Frisbee in a long, long time. Three hours into the game and I'm pretty winded - a minor letdown, since I'm so ambitious about running. Gotta step up the game if I'm gonna play it, I guess.

I had a really good time Saturday night when Amy had the frisbee team over for a get-together. The night started off well, with good discussion and plenty of bad jokes. As the night went on, our group had shifted into two separate but equal factions: the beer pongers and the card players. Since it was a Jefferson gathering and beer pong is ALWAYS played on the breakfast bar - I declined to join. Something about a five foot long beer pong table doesn't strike me as a challenge. So I instead played one of my favorite booze-related card games in Asshole. I quickly started off by being the Asshole in the first two rounds thanks to excellent strategy by Train (skip Crock...ugh...). The game hung together a lot longer than I had thought it would and ended right as I was to be president for a third time, thus denying me "create a rule" privileges. No matter, it was still a hell of a lot of fun. At some point, though, there's gotta be a cutoff limit when it comes to switching music...

Oh, and then there's the news about my phony MBA. I'll save that story for later, though.

audit-toberfest

2008-04-02T16:03:00.003-04:00

Normally I don't like to double-post on the same day. I think its easier to keep a consistent, day-to-day process blog style. Maybe that's something I should change. I'm all about consistency and symmetry. For real, I did a self-audit on this blog before officially changing it over from "Sex Panther 2" to "Crocktoberfest" and I noticed a few interesting things.

First, I tend to capitalize every letter of a significant word when titling my blog posts. That made me think "What am I, some kind of poet?" (Actually, I am, but that's neither here nor there.) There's no poetry on this blog! I think what mattered the most to me was that the capitalization followed a structure and produced a symmetrical, eye-pleasing form. I can remember as little as a few years ago how I really didn't care about structure or form or good posture or anything of the like. So, in an effort to snub myself, I've decided that my blog titles will go all lower-case. Now, I know what you must be thinking; "all lowercase is more symmetrical than the capital letters!" Then why did I continue to do this? Because its a more natural symmetry. It requires no press of the SHIFT key. And because I don't wanna be the guy who's all about form, structure, attending finishing school and going to "coming-out" parties. I'd like to remain my old, fun self. I've got to not lose sight of the younger, random dude I was a few years ago.

Second, what the hell happened to me in 2006? According to my blog, that was the Crock-equivalent of the dark ages. Two blog posts for an entire year? I wonder what had me so busy. If I recall correctly, I believe I was wrapping up my work with the family business. It by no means should have prevented me from blogging, though. My digital absence certainly wasn't due to a lack of things to talk about. We shut down the family business, my old man passed away and I graduated college. Man, I could have posted three more blogs that year. haha.

Lastly, I'm damn poor. I'm saving to build a house, and I think I might be getting a little cabin fever. When I truly set my mind to something, I see it through to the end as quickly as possible. That's how I'm approaching this house construction. I'm saving any excess money I have from my paydays in an exciting, Mexican bank account. (Want a tip? This isn't 1963. Swiss bank accounts aren't all the rave. Get with the times.) Sure I allow myself $20 each payday -- my play money. But, Reese and I have started our "Disney DVD Collection" and the twenty bones I allow myself every two weeks goes toward the Disney movie of our choice. Its not a bad way to spend twenty clams, but that leaves me stranded at home for the entire month unless Rollo opts to drive us somewhere to hang out and pay for everything we do there. (Rare!) I think this is a huge reason why I find myself more structured and needed to fit to form. I've got myself in such a pattern of...:

Waking up
Going to work
Going to class
Going to the gym
Going running
Getting a shower
Maybe eating
Going to sleep

...that I'm bamboozled when the weekend gets here, and I finally have some free time. My newfound wisdom says "stay home and chill, can't waste money driving anywhere 'cause gas is too expensive and all your friends live in adjacent counties." So, I stay put and occupy my time with an endless supply of cats and World of Warcraft. Thank God warmer weather is on the way, and the days are getting longer!

Thus, my creativity and funlovingness (errr?) is sapped. This weekend will be good, though. There's a frisbee tournament in Juniata that I'll be attending. That'll get the winter funk blown off of me, and it'll be cheap too. Maybe that's just the inspiration I need.

It also helps that it's Metallica Wednesday - a day where I can put my iPod on my Metallica playlist for the entire day for no reason aside from that its Wednesday. It sure makes the workday go faster, and gets me pumped to do just about anything here. Aside from Friday, its my favorite day!

i'm in charge here

2008-04-02T10:21:00.001-04:00

The clouds have lifted, the sun is shining, birds are singing and plugged into an outlet in my dining room is a little battery pack. That's right, the new battery charger has arrived.

Rollo greeted me with the little charger in complete silence last night. After all, it was a pretty intense moment. We've gone without a power supply for a long time, so it was understood that as soon as we got the charger in our possession - it was business time. I have to admit, it wasn't exactly what I had expected. I thought we were getting a bona-fide power supply for this thing. What we really received was a battery charger (big difference physically, not much difference functionally). It's pretty slick. Aside from the car charger accessory, it doesn't have any chords. In fact, instead of trying to explain it - I'll just link the picture. It's a nifty gadget!

So I let the dead battery charge all night. Maybe tonight I'll goof around with it.

I still won't relinquish my hunt for the original power supply, though. It's awful handy to have an actual power supply when the battery's running low.

so it begins

2008-04-01T08:26:00.001-04:00

Here's the new (and by the looks of the weather, very appropriate) headliner. I think its tag-line is the funniest yet. What do you think?

march recap

2008-03-31T11:59:00.001-04:00

In this edition of my monthly recap, I'm bringing back a much-missed segment - where I link pictures on the net to help illustrate my feelings at the time these events occurred. YEAH MAN!

So I kicked off March by completing our wedding registries. This was much more painful than I could imagine. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy walking around all day long while scanning things on a little barcode reader as much as the next guy. I just enjoy a good sit every now and again. So, for the rest of the month I sat on the couch. (kidding)

Alissa threw a kick ass party. Ladies were makin' out with other ladies. Beer was flowing like songs from an overworked minstrel. Rollo found Jesus. (Literally, he found some little hispanic kid at a 7-11 named Jesus) And I got Rollo's car stuck in a snowbank. I do this once a year.

Then came fantasy drafts, the start of my fiscal year. The baseball drafts are always something to behold - mostly because they aren't ever well-organized. This year was a pleasant surprise because we knocked out two drafts in a single day (organized for once!). Eight of the ten managers met for our final draft of the day and talked so much trash that McBride forgot to draft a third baseman until the second-to-last round. How he still managed to get Hank Blalock on his roster is still a mystery to me. Reese showed the most enthusiasm by arming herself with ten-thousand draft cheat-sheets and gumption that I've never seen before. Beautiful.

The next weekend McBride threw a party in which Reese and I were crowned the king & queen of beer pong, but not so much flipcup. Can't win em all.

I then fell terminally ill... Nah I'm just playin', but I did get sick for the better part of two or three weeks. I missed a ton of time from work, but I'm better now.

The end of the month saw my much-hyped NCAA brackets fail miserably. I'm not so much worried about that since I've got other things to occupy my time.

Upcoming projects!
The Famous Internet Actor, Johns Grocket, has created a blog dedicated his acting skills and he's been using it to further his search for work.

Fantastic News!
Rollo's search for my camera's power supply didn't turn up anything. The box marked "Joyce" (which was actually in his barn, not in storage) turned up nothing, aside from the "Rollo's lost brother" (we gave him a good home). He has since ordered a replacement power supply, which should arrive any day now.

Tomorrow, my gift to you will be a new headliner image.

my kingdom for a power supply

2008-03-25T11:04:00.001-04:00

Sweet merciful heavens, I have a kickass video camera and I can't use it because the power supply has gone missing. A battery isn't gonna charge itself on my good looks alone (although somebody should really invent this).

An investigation has led Rollo and I to believe that it has gone missing somewhere in Thompson #1, most likely at Rollo's house. While Rollo's executed a sustained, three-day search for the cord - all efforts have turned up ZILCH.

Our newest and hottest lead has placed the power cord in a nearby storage facility in a box marked "Joyce". Though our informant is inherently unreliable (...Joyce...), I'm fielding more reports that are consistent with this one. Our next course of action is to intercept Rollo's mom and serve her a search warrant. We will then proceed to the storage area and rifle through her junk. When we recover the misplaced cord, we'll begin emergency charge procedures for the camera battery.

Shortly thereafter, I'm sure we'll make a short film.

Rollo, since I know you're gonna be the first one to read this - READY THE VIBE. Tomorrow night, we move on this.

crippled bracket

2008-03-21T09:08:00.003-04:00

This year Rollo put together one of the largest bracket pools I've ever seen. We've got over thirty-five (that's 35+!!!) people in this thing. So yesterday, I've got my whole day planned out: I'd work my ass off in the morning, take half my lunch break to goof off and then at 12:20pm - settle in for a long day of rooting for the likes of Temple, USC and BYU.

You probably can already tell what my issue be (be???). USC and BYU made a game of it, losing in the closing moments. That's just some tough luck. But Temple was my 5/12 upset. Temple, Temple, Temple... I should have really known better. They were never really in it from the start.

The night before the tournament started, I talked so much crap on Rollo's bracket, while hyping my own. I even owe him $5 now because of BYU! Our brackets are almost polar opposites, so yeah, he's doing MIGHTY fine right about now. Good for him, though. He definitely knows college basketball.

So my bracket's toast. I've incorrectly picked four winners, having USC in the sweet sixteen. Thanks Southern Cal!

continue-ment

2008-03-18T10:47:00.000-04:00

Getting back to the St. Patrick's day thing, McBride threw a kickass party Saturday evening. Reese and I showed up at about 8:30 to an already very rowdy scene. Signore Popcorn was decked out in his holiday best and things were going well until I realized that the beer I had brought was sitting in Rollo's car all day. Jim came to the rescue with his horde of Genessee Cream Ale. As much as I loathe this brand of beer, it was seriously the best available there. Runners up in the beer selection included Labatt Blue and Red Dog (see my predicament?) Back in the day, we used to get free kegs of Genny Light and it was so bad that we rarely kicked them. The cream ale wasn't so bad though - just don't expect to use it during flip-cup.

Reese and I revisited my sophomore/junior year of college by running the beer pong table. We lost once, but that was good enough to be champions. The championship game was electric! I nailed cup after cup until it was time to close out the game. That's where Reese finished off the game by making the last shot and freeing Jim from the confines under the table. Why was Jim under the table? Probably because he'd come to enjoy it. He spent a lot of time under there that night, as it was a fit punishment for anybody who failed to make a cup during beer pong. Flip-cup wasn't so good to us. McBride, Rollo, Devinney, Monica, and Mike V. make up the team that is known as "Big Dicks". That leaves Reese, KTK, Jim and myself to work with one random (this time it happened to be Alex, who gave a valiant effort) in an attempt to gain ground on a team that has played together for a while now. Needless to say, wins aren't something we hang our hat on.

Those were the big events. Other notable happenings included the usual streaking (and I still can't figure out why this keeps happening) and Signore Popcorn getting punched and suffering a nice sized gash in his left side. We had to create a make-shift bandage out of masking tape, but he still partied harder than most of us. We all signed his bandage to show our support. Devinney also got punched. Come to think about it, he got punched by a lot of people. Serves him right for punching Signore Popcorn for no reason.

So as bleak as St. Patty's day started, it really ended on a rip-roarious high note. I didn't even get a hang over. Score one for Genessee Cream Ale and score one for Crock!

last week(end)

2008-03-17T10:20:00.002-04:00

(In Brett Michaels elimination-time-tone)
Okay, I've got lots to say about last week, so lets just get right into it.

Last Thursday and Friday I attended some UNIX training on the South Side. The class was a five-day class, but I had already taken the UNIX I portion of it in November, so I opted out of the first three days. Well, on my way into the city I decided to follow my Garmin instead of going the route I knew. I did this for two reasons; first - I had left early enough to account for any traffic I may encounter, and secondly - I trust the Garmin far too infrequently. So, my good Garmin shoots me down route 51 to the liberty tubes. No big deal. I catch some serious traffic, but nothing I hadn't expected. I had "It was a good day" by Ice Cube playin', and I indeed didn't have to use my A.K. Through the liberty tubes I drove, and got onto Forbes. I soon turned onto 10th, and it was there I got a real treat. A young woman was walking in a crosswalk after a car had just fully stopped at a stop sign directly in front of her. She proceeded to walk into the crosswalk and made it about five steps before the car at the stop sign chirped tire and nearly hit her dead-on. Startled, she jumped back a little then (and I love this part) she monkey-stomps his bumper - HARD! Power to the people! After stompin', she casually walks away as if she won a small victory against the car-oppressor. The dude in the car even had his window down, but said NOTHING to the woman. Good for this chick, man. I tell you, if that would've happened to me, I wouldn't have thought to stomp the bumper, thats for sure.

Saturday brought the Spirit of St. Patrick's day out in full swing. Reese, Rollo and I started the day off by waking up at 7:30am and driving to South Hills Village. We hopped on the T and rode into Pittsburgh. Market square was alive with drunk-bodys. We caught the tail-end of the parade (which was pretty cool) that included some smallish terrier dogs, some large Irish Wolfhounds and an an Irish band in a dumptruck. Now that's a unique way to round out a parade!

Market Square wasn't quite so pleasant. On one hand it was awesome to see Stephanie Altomonte there, and catch up with her. On the other hand, though, while we were catching up - some dude decided to urinate on the wall right behind us... then turn around... then brag about it... then kick some of the puddle he made towards us... With some harsh words, we chased him off, but that pretty much summed up Market Square for the afternoon. Asses-to-Ankles. It was also the first time I had ever seen Joe look terminally ill. All of this on top of $4 beers made me really re-think my decision to come here. I don't mind a big party but I don't wanna have to pay $16 to get a mild buzz. Bah.

More about the weekend in a later post!

(Back to Brett-tone)
Well, weekend, we didn't connect on as many levels as I thought we should. I'm sorry but your tour ends here.

my fiscal year

2008-03-11T14:44:00.001-04:00

As of Saturday, March 8, I closed the books on another productive year. Of course, I follow the Gregorian calendar as best I can but when it comes to my hobbies - the fantasy baseball draft kicks off the start of my fiscal year. And WHAT a year Crock Enterprises had! This year, I won my first "Triple Crown". That is, I convincingly won championships in three major sports; baseball, football and hockey. Recap with me, won't you?

I started things off right by trouncing my to-be fiancee, Reese, in the hockey championship by riding my then-stellar pickups of Andrew Raycroft and Peter Budaj to victory. Those two goalies weren't even thought of on draft day, but I'll take a hot streak especially when its a two-fer! This indeed was a sign of things to come.

I regularly participate in two baseball leagues - my own and Drew's. While Rollo tore through my league with his rag-tag team of AL-East castoffs, I turned my attention to Drew's league. Again, I mined significant talent, this time riding a player I found in the last round of the draft. Who'da thunk I'd unearth a talent so immense that he alone could propel me into contention. I speak of the one and only Russell Martin (I'll take a 20/20 season from a catcher ANY DAY). I'm so damn proud of that pick (a pick I made in both leagues, mind you). It'll probably be the best final-round pick I'll ever make. I took out some dude's dad in the finals, thanks in no small part to Russell Martin's amazing season.

My football team seemed destined for doom from day one until I pulled off a trade that brought my team back from the brink. Five games into the season, I sent Tony Romo and Brandon Marshall to "The Pizzy Guys" (a perennial failure of a team) for Joseph Addai and Eli Manning. Sure the price seemed steep to begin with, but now my team was armed with Colts (Peyton, Reggie, Addai) and ready to put up some serious numbers. Fortune was on my side again as I joined the Colts in having a memorable regular season. Much unlike the Colts, I defeated my season-long nemesis (Necciai) in the playoffs en route to handing Drew an upset of a lifetime. My final roster? Not to go into details but (my, God!) I had Todd Collins handling my QB duties. Hey, a win's a win!

I even took second place in Rollo's annual March Madness pool. So, looking back, maybe I didn't brag enough. Actually, I'm sure I didn't. Boy, that's gonna change this year. After all, I am the reigning champ in over half of these leagues.

party town and bad britches

2008-03-05T09:10:00.002-05:00

Alissa threw a party over the weekend that was quite a sight to behold. You can always gauge a party by guessing how many people the host knows. In my estimate, she knew about 80% of the people there. That's the "sweet spot" of partying. An 80/20 split between people you know and people you don't know is awesome when it comes to meeting people. You get a few drinking games going, see where these people are from, what they're doing, and connect with them. It's also great because there are too few new people to cause a party-shift; where a group will "steal" the party from the host (almost always resulting in drama).

This party was a good one. Reese, Rollo and I arrived around 9:30ish and immediately talked with some of our good friends, and got to meet some others. I found out that Kimmie will be leaving for Florida sometime in the near future, which I think everyone's bummed about. I met the much-heralded Jim McBride; brother of Ryan, son of "Papa McBride" (who has a simply astonishing full head of hair). I also got to meet Matt, who gave me his last name - but I immediately chose to ignore it, referring to him exclusively as "Matt Whohasnolastname".

As good as it was, the party had its weird moments. Ryan got his scurvy crew into going streaking. While this is not unlike McBride to suggest such a thing, certain questions crept into my mind. Questions like: "Why does this keep happening?" and "Wouldn't it be cool if we locked the door?" Ah, well...

On the way out, I got Rollo's car stuck in a snowbank. For the record, Alissa's house is built on a hill and the entrance to her driveway is on another hill, which means the better portion of her driveway is a valley. There were a lot of cars in the driveway so when we arrived, I parked as I drove in (nose first). In trying to leave, there was no place to turn around and little room to maneuver otherwise, so I built up speed coming down the hill from the house and only made it halfway up the other hill. Then began the laborious process of getting the car turned around. My 3-point-turn quickly turned into a 25-and-a-half-point-turn aaaaaaaaaaaand, we're stuck. Rollo gave a valiant effort by helping me rock the car back & forth, but we ultimately needed additional manpower. Luckily McBride heard Rollo's deep bellow for help and he rallied his troops to come push us out. Even more luckily, they all had clothes on. We really dodged a bullet there.

wedding registry

2008-03-03T09:45:00.000-05:00

Over the weekend, Reese and I have finally completed our wedding gift registries at Bed, Bath and Beyond (Saturday) and Walmart (Sunday) (links to each are to the right). We practically spent an entire workday at Bed, Bath and Beyond picking out possible wedding gifts. Since we're having such a huge wedding, our adviser recommended that we go wild and pick out as much stuff as possible. I thought that would be a cool thing to do, you know - take a little ray-gun around the store scanning anything and everything we'd like to have - it would be nothing but fun!... or so I thought...

I'm gonna be completely honest here, when it comes to wedding registries - I'm damn clueless. Couple that with the fact that I'd never been to Bed, Bath and Beyond before in my life and we've got a recipe for a long ass day. Our adviser had us pick out fine china as the first step, which was fine. We chose a nice dinner set, some crystal and good silverware. Then, we immediately moved to the drinking room (?!??!?!). Now, don't get me wrong. I enjoy a cold drink as much as the next person, but in my mind I had assumed we'd deal with the really IMPORTANT things first, then progress to the fun stuff. Before we arrived, I put my mind in a zone where I was here to build a home, not to party. This obviously wasn't the case, so I had to quickly switch gears and make frantic decisions about which beer mugs go best with our yet-to-be-built basement bar. Not an easy decision. Looking back, I probably should have taken five minutes to collect myself and then pounced on the opportunity to get some sweet drinking paraphernalia. We did eventually get around to the necessary items, which was awesome because Reese and I were pretty much on the same page about everything, without us ever having serious discussions about color schemes.

The worst part of the day came when we were never given the opportunity to have a nice sit down. If we'd have taken two five minute sits throughout the adventure, then I'd probably have been much more jubilant about our "nine inch relish tray" or our "3 pack of whisks".

The Walmart registry was much kinder to my knees, but the ordeal took just as long. I was much more at home here and since we've already done one registry, it was simple enough to replicate the steps. We even got to register for some "hope-and-pray" gifts, like our 42" LCD HDTV.

So anyway, the dust has settled and the registries are complete. You can click the links to the right to get us some nice stuff. Do it.

february recap

2008-02-29T11:49:00.001-05:00

Well, February was nothing short of interesting. The start of the month totally changed my life. Nickles ripped the soul from my body by ceasing the production of my beloved fat-free bread. I bought up the remaining six loaves and ate every last one of them in triumphant glory. My replacement bread isn't anywhere near as good (or as hearty) but it'll do. At least I don't have to modify my lifestyle. That would have been much more difficult than going on a trek for fat-free bread. And hey, at least I got some cool coupons from their response to the letter I wrote them.

I spent one miserable night away from my bed in order to complete support pack upgrades on our SRM system at work. While I'm no stranger to late nights, I definitely didn't come prepared as I struggled to stay awake. After my work was complete (and many hours of watching Spongebob DVDs), I was able to make a hasty exit at 6:00am. I couldn't avert disaster though, as I ended up missing the next few days of work with the grip. Come to think of it, I missed more work in the month of February than I have missed in a LONG time. I hope to have put all of that crap behind me. The grand total of my absenteeism - 5 days. (scattered throughout the month)

I scored a Valentine's day haul that was awfully good. My love for the show "Flight of the Conchords" grew to immeasurable proportions, so Reese got me the complete first season on DVD. I also got a 12 month subscription to a home brewing magazine called Brew Your Own. (link to the right)

Reese and I finally settled on building a house. We've got some money saved and we've settled on a design. She even picked out the best building spot on the hill. Now all that's left to do is get some land signed over to my name, and we'll be cookin!

One of my favorite parts of the month comes toward the end, when I got promoted. After a downright unpleasant meeting with management earlier in the month regarding my salary, they surprised me with an incredible raise. This was something I had seen coming, although not quite to the extent at which it was taken. Long story short, I got more than I had wanted and it puts Reese and I in a very good position in terms of building our house.

February rounded out to be a decent month, all things considered. New headliner image tomorrow. I bet everyone's excited. What's even better is I'm blogging on a payday. Woo!
(Oh! And how could I get outa this month without brining up Rollo's laundry day one more time? Dead of winter? Temps in the single digits? No matter. Rollo will wear shorts at any cost on laundry day.)

papa's promoted!

2008-02-27T13:30:00.000-05:00

Just two days ago I called Reese on my way home from work. I had asked her if she thinks I should stick around Consol much longer since I could probably make more money elsewhere. She's ever the optimist, telling me to stick it out seeing as how it will be a valuable experience and that my current job will lead to much better things down the road. Not a day later do I walk into work when the director and vice president of IS&T approach me and request that meet them in the director's office. Its not often that they'll both ask you to sit down with them for a chat, and its even more rare that you'll meet with them for something good. (a few of you may remember the malady that occurred a month earlier when they were pissed that I had applied elsewhere for a job) Much to my relief though, it was a damn pleasant meeting.

On Friday (without me knowing), the decision was passed down from the president that I was to be promoted effective February 25th. The promotion wasn't a "structural" promotion where I would assume a different position - it was a salary-grade promotion. Meaning I do the same job, I just earn more money. I've also got my annual performance raise coming in April, which I'm very excited about. All said, I'm not going to need to find another job right away.

Tying it all up, I thought it interesting that no more than a day later Reese turns out to be right. (yet again)

pencil pencil

2008-02-25T13:17:00.002-05:00

Aside from taking the occasional exam at the 'U, I really don't have much use for pencils anymore. I came to this realization this morning when I was attending a mandatory "Drug & Alcohol Awareness" program here at the plaza. As I took my seat directly in front of the bowl of candy, (arriving 10 minutes early pays VAST dividends while enduring boring meetings) I had noticed the same pencil/paper combination that's set out for every mandatory meeting: three sheets of loose-leaf, Consol letterhead and a single #2 Ticonderoga pencil sharpened to precision with the finest of Swingline brand pencil sharpeners. As usual, I take my own notebook to these functions so I can jot down podcast ideas, general ramblings or realities I tend to misconstrue. So boring was the meeting that I needed to keep writing something --- ANYTHING --- to remain awake. I ended up ditching my pen (which was unusually messy for a Monday - he typically starts the work week strong) for the given pencil. I began to write:

Pencil Pencil
Pencil Pencil

"who the hell uses a pencil in the era of digital words?"
"this is keeping me awake"
DAMN BORING PRESENTATION
"i hardly ever write with a pencil"
be sure to BLOG about this

Ticonderoga, suckers!

many conflicting decisions

2008-02-22T14:30:00.002-05:00

Since the beginning of the year, Reese and I have tried to develop a plan for dealing with our current housing issue. Sure, we're fine living at home for now, but there will come a time (some say as soon as July) where we should really have our own digs. We've gone from being totally "gun-ho" about renting a small place, to renting a small house to our current thought - which is to build a friggin' house.

Rewinding a bit, since I've graduated college I've become somewhat of a dabbler in the realm of finance/accounting. I take great pride in knowing where my cash goes and having a well balanced budget. What I've learned about finance in the past year could fill blogs upon blogs. (God, I love acquiring knowledge!) Now that I'm more educated in how my money can work for me, I realize that Reese and I would only be wasting lots (and I mean LOTS) of valuable income if we were to rent anything aside from a shanty in beautiful downtown Filbert.

The only way to make money is to spend money. We can do this by building a home on a plot of land that my mom will parcel out to me. I figure if I can tap into the resources that I know this land possesses (like earth, wind and fire!), building just might be worthwhile. No way in hell am I going to throw half a paycheck into rent and have nothing to show for it.

Tomorrow, I'll start taking initial mappings for the beast.

a (now) open letter to nickles

2008-02-19T10:51:00.001-05:00

Earlier in the month I had written to the Nickles Bakery regarding their recently discontinued fat-free bread. They were prompt in their response, but they also confirmed that they had no intentions of producing my beloved breads again. They also sent me three coupons for $0.99 off of any Nickles product. I thought it nice, that they'd send me such a prompt reply complete with coupons. While I've ceased my affiliation with any Nickles product (not out of spite, they just don't have anything I like now) I'm posting my letter as a testament to the former bread, or in case anyone happens to share my sentiment. This paragraph was obviously not included in the letter...

------------------------

February 6, 2008

Alfred Nickles Bakery
26 N. Main St.
Navarre, OH 44662
330-879-5635

To whom this may concern:

For years, I've enjoyed a number of excellent products that the Nickles Bakery produces ranging from breads to angel food cakes. I write you feeling both disappointed and thankful. First, I'm thankful to have enjoyed a product that you've produced for years that served as a catalyst for my personal weight-loss success. I'm, of course, referring to the Multi-Grain and Honey White premium fat-free breads that have recently been discontinued. In an age where few companies cared enough to produce such a product, you had come through with bread that wasn't simply "fat-free" but one that tasted like normal bread should taste. Believe me when I say this, the only other bread company that has a fat-free offering tastes miserable. With your two varieties of fat-free bread, you had truly done something right.

I'm discouraged to learn that you will no longer be producing or supplying these breads. Yesterday I had made a trip to the nearby Nickles thrift store to purchase the last remaining six loaves of the fat-free Multi Grain bread where a store clerk confirmed this. Further, the store clerk went on to inform me that the "fat-free" line of breads will be replaced with the "light 35" – a choice which I find unacceptable.

I'd like thank the Nickles Bakery for the production of this vastly superior product over the past few years. I cannot express how much I have truly enjoyed this product since early 2004. Since the decision has been made, I find little reason to continue shopping at the Nickles Thrift Store and I have since begun my pursuit of a comparable product. Should the Nickles Bakery return to producing the "fat-free" breads, I'd immediately switch back to the Nickles brand. However, for now, I'll now be shopping elsewhere.

Thanks again for the years of a superior product.

Sincerely,

Joshua J. Crockett

the v-day haul

2008-02-18T14:49:00.001-05:00

For Valentine's day, I got hit with a lawsuit of immeasurable proportions.

Heh, naw, I did end up getting some cool stuff from Reese. At the top of the list was season one of "Flight of the Conchords" on DVD. This was awfully thoughtful of Reese because I've only recently gotten into the show. It shows she's paying attention. My second gift was a small stuffed pirate/bear. I can't tell if he's more pirate than bear or more bear than pirate. If I do know one thing - its that he means business. My last gift really shows how much Reese knows me. She purchased me a 12 month subscription to Brew Your Own magazine. (which also gets a bump to the "Excellent Links" section) For years, Rollo and I have yipped and yapped about how we're going to make our own lager/ale and now those plans get a shove in the right direction. A most excellent haul.

Now if I can only find the power supply for my video cam...

armed to the teeth

2008-02-13T03:38:00.001-05:00

So its about 3:45am and I'm about halfway through an all-nighter that I booked here at work. I'm upgrading the support packs on one of our SAP installations and this can't be done during normal business hours (it hoses things up). So we bring the system down in the wee hours of the morning and do the implementation. I'm absolutely armed to the teeth with things to do while the support packs install and I attempt to stave off sleep. I've got two complete seasons of Spongebob Squarepants on DVD here with me (seasons 3 and 4) as well as the first Spongebob movie. I've already knocked out season 4, so to try and break the monotony I'm listening to some sweet music. I'll tackle the Spongebob movie next.

My lack of sleep is quite apparent. My eyes are red and really burning and I'm droning on about nothing in particular. In fact, I had to delete a whole paragraph where I pitted Modest Mouse against Franz Ferdinand. I definitely miss my bed. With any luck I'll get outa here by 7:00 and be in bed by 8:00.

its laundry day

2008-02-11T14:22:00.001-05:00

I've seen Rollo wear shorts on some of the COLDEST days ever. Yesterday the high was around 20ish, and Rollo didn't make it to my place until 6:00 (so, we're talking temperatures in the teens). Why does he do this? Well, his supply of usable pants apparently dwindles to zero on "laundry day". This day, of course, is the weekly ceremonious occasion that sees the the beast himself defy all odds by placing both pair of his squalid pants into a boiling cauldron. He then prays. This is done not only to remove stains but to remove the curses as well. There's no telling what kind of witch-doctors or shamen (sha-women?... god, I hope...) he encounters while seeking the fine pussums. (Heh, boiling pants to exorcise the demons... who'da thunk?)

So Rollo wears shorts in the dead of winter. Unwise, but necessary. Moving along...

Why can't Kanye West finally get a "Best Album" grammy? His past two (arguably three) albums were tightly-woven works of genius. He's an incredible performer, and brings it every time he steps to the mic. Seriously now, what more does this guy have to do?

no sleep til bread

2008-02-07T16:06:00.001-05:00

So I've had a contingency plan in place for just such a plight. Schwebel's makes a similar product to the former Nickles' fat-free bread. I've eaten it on several occasions, though I'm none too pleased with it. By comparison the slices are smaller and it tastes weirder. While I can deal with the smaller slices (eat more, right?) the taste leaves a lot to be desired. This bread is supposed to be wheat-based, but I can almost detect a hint of rye in it. It finishes a little bitter.

My displeasure goes deeper than just size and taste. Now comes the ultimate inconvenience: the toaster setting. Over the years, I've spent months finding my "toasting groove". This is where I would periodically adjust the knob on the toaster in an effort to achieve total toast perfection - or TTP. This past Christmas, I was gifted a digital toaster by Reese's mom and used it to find my newest groove. It's taken a while to become familiar with the way it toasts (its a 4-slicer, i had an old 2-slicer) but after rigorous nights of test-toasting, I achieved TTP. Now that I've got smaller slices to work with, I've got to begin that process all over again. That equates to time and bread lost! What may have been good for the generously-sliced Nickles bread, may blacken my Schwebel's. You may think I'm overly meticulous, but nobody likes burned toast. I'm very passionate in regards to my warm, crisp bread.

So, is Schwebel's the answer? NOPE! I'm treating this situation in the same manner the Red Sox handle Curt Schilling: its not getting any better but its good enough to hang around for a little while longer - but ONLY until something better comes along... or until it blows its loaf (shoulder?) out...

punishment for loafing

2008-02-06T13:41:00.001-05:00

For years one thought alone has plagued me.

"What if Nickles Bakery stopped producing fat-free bread?"

Ask anybody who's close to me how I deeply I value my bread and they'll likely tell you a tale as tall as Rollo. Yesterday, that thought became reality. As my search for what remained of this bread extended to the corners of three counties, it appropriately ended at the Nickles Bakery thrift store in Washington. I immediately snatched the remaining six loaves from the shelf and proceeded to check out.

*queue The Undertaker's theme music*

While I was checking out, the clerk made small talk. None of which was important until she babbled on about how Nickles will be replacing my fat-free bread with a "Light 35" bread. A bread so filled with rancor, that it plays host to 0.5g of fat per slice. So, not only will the calories-per-slice increase by 5, the total fat in the amount of bread will increase from zero to somewhere near 10g of fat per loaf. That's a 100% increase from what I'd normally eat and completely unacceptable.

Knowing damn well this day was bound to arrive at some point, I tried my best to prepare myself. Sure I've got the motherload of bread in my passenger seat, but after this is gone - that's it! So now what? Well, I briefly explored the idea of selling the loaves on ebay, but decided if anybody's gonna enjoy these bastards it'll be me. Instead, I've already written a letter to the corporate headquarters of the Nickles Bakery. Broke three knuckles writing it. (a lie!) I don't expect that to solve any of my problems. Hell, if letters solved problems, we'd all get rich via penmanship. I don't expect it to do anything. I've got bigger concerns now.

happy february

2008-02-01T08:11:00.000-05:00

And enjoy the new headliner.

january recap

2008-01-31T10:50:00.001-05:00

On the last day of each month I'm going to recap what went on in the past 30-some (a 30-sum? don't mind if I do!) days. Let's see what I did this month:

I started the month off by blasting off to Buffalo on New Year's eve with Reese, Rollo and moms. On New Year's day, we attended the most amazing hockey game I've ever seen - the NHL Winter Classic. We met our good friend Petey there and pregame'd in the blistering cold. We even saw the mounties mount-up for a man-hunt!

The next week saw me spend five days in Philadelphia for some SAP training. The trip there was mind-numbing but once I was settled in my suite, it really wasn't that bad. The internet connection left a lot to be desired and they didn't have Nickelodeon, but the training center was nice and served a free lunch. All you can eat, baby.

I arrived home that Saturday, in time to finally buy books for my two graduate courses (which is a story in itself). How quickly Mondays and Thursdays have become my bane! These two days are stretched so thin that I'm arriving home no earlier than 9:00, which says a lot about what I can eat for dinner (hint: not much). Who eats dinner after 7:00 anyway? Needless to say, I'm appreciative that I can actually attend class again but its coming at an exhausting expense. Heh, I'll adapt.

For what time remained in January it seemed like anything could happen. Reese and I spoke with a mortgage broker, a realtor, a lender and a rental specialist to discuss our housing options (which we're still working on). On Sundays, we'd watch football and hit a case of Sam Adams "Winter Beers" HARD. There were a few excellent bar nights in there too, hailing from both Uniontown and California. McBride and I started a lifting program, the Cal U Ultimate Frisbee team welcomed me back and I've even orchestrated the first meeting of my groomsmen. All things considered, I've had a damn productive month!

Tomorrow, I'll unveil the new February headliner image! It's rrrrrrrrrrrandy!

hambone'd

2008-01-30T09:17:00.000-05:00

McBride and I finally made our triumphant return to weightlifting yesterday. Today my body is killing me. Anything that isn't in my lower hemisphere is pretty sore right now. I haven't seriously lifted weights since about 2002, and it sure showed. I couldn't complete my last set on the bench press with 135lbs on the bar. I remember the days when I used to easily work out with 225lbs. Now, that's some seriously weak shit - I used to use 135 to warm up. Although I'm a bit disappointed, my plan here isn't to become the avid weight lifter I once was. No, my plan is to become buff enough so that when I go back to the tux shoppe they say "whoa! if we keep you in this tux, there's a good chance you'll 'Hulk out' of it at some point during your wedding ceremony". Yeah, I can picture that going well. "HULK DO!"

Tonight we'll be recording the 40th episode of Crock & Murph in the Morning, which should silence the few of you who've been clamoring for a new broadcast. I encourage anyone reading this to be a part of it (you know how to get ahold of me). On Saturday, I'm hosting the first "meeting of the groomsmen" where we'll discuss the developing wedding issues and most certainly end up plenty drunk. Speaking of which, I should probably go get a case for them to enjoy...

Rollo sent me this last week and it's been killing me ever since:

lunch won the battle

2008-01-24T16:00:00.001-05:00

Man, I'm hungry. So what do I do when I'm hungry? I think about food that I'll never eat. In fact, I was viewing some rather interesting bento lunches (you won't regret clicking that link) when I realized I'm not going to get to feed until after 9:00 tonight. Thursdays are extra long days for me since I work until 4:30 and attend class until almost 9:00. So right now, I'm in a bad spot to be hungry. Eating lunch makes me sleepy, so I ditch that for browsing. I don't snack here because it distracts me. I bowl through the day using only the power of breakfast. I just really wish I'd remember to eat a bigger meal of the morning. (sounds awfully professional -- meal of the morning)

And what the hell is this crap? I can't even read that garbage. More importantly, who eats this stuff?!? Funny picture, though!

hittin' the weights

2008-01-23T15:26:00.001-05:00

The more I think about it, I really need to start lifting weights. Aside from the infrequent trip to the bar I'm always looking for new ways to improve my health. I run enough, but the intensity of my running tends to plateau each year at about mid-winter. When it comes right down to it, how can't it? Its cold out and I have to replace an entire park with a treadmill. Bleh. I guess hitting the weights was always an option but I haven't had any interest in lifting lately. Not that I found it boring, I just feel out of place. Something about sweatin' it out with dudes who literally eat the dumbbells after their last set didn't seem appealing to me. (Not that I find it particularly appealing now) That being said, I've determined the following: most importantly, I'm not the Buccos - I can't just pack up shoppe and go to Bradenton, FL for spring training. Secondly, there is no winter "running league". So, with that in mind, I talked with McBride today and we agreed that we should go to the gym and lift at least three times a week. Sounds good to me!

the candidate calculator

2008-01-22T14:04:00.001-05:00

I'm no political zealot but I try to keep up on which democratic presidential candidate best aligns with my beliefs. This isn't always easy. I've kept tabs on the primaries and tried to focus on "how I feel" versus "how each candidate feels" in the debates. Let me tell you, without a paper and pen - I've had no real shot at doing this what with all the double-talk and clever (and sometimes not-so-clever) dodging.

With that in mind, I know way too many people who either aren't interested in the upcoming presidential election or aren't concerned about the issues that surround the candidates. Who actually wants to watch a debate, anyway? I do it only because I truly have to. It is my firm belief that if you work and receive a real paycheck while working in the US, then you've got a decision to make come election day. At the very least, this whole election process affects how much you get paid and that's enough to stir me to take an interest in the election.

I suggest that if you don't have time for the election or are completely uninterested, that you visit the website below. It's got a calculator-style program that helps you find the presidential candidate that best reflects your ideas, values and beliefs. It only takes four or five minutes if you need an explanation on several issues (and I did). I'm not saying it's the end-all, beat-all tool that will absolutely determine who you should vote for. All I'm saying is that if you plan to vote and don't have time to follow the election, this link can't hurt.

http://www.vajoe.com/candidate_calculator.html

the weekender

2008-01-21T09:03:00.001-05:00

This weekend was really good to me. First, Reese & I met with a realtor on Friday about some rental properties, which I believe was a waste of time. We shrugged that off and went to J Coles to throw back some cold ones with some good friends --- the $5 miller light buckets treated us damn well. It was nice to finally sit down and drink a few beers with Chuck - one of my oldest and best friends. Add McBride and Rollo to the equation and we've got almost half of the groomsmen in the building. This was much needed as I had to find a way to blow off some steam after the particularly crappy day of work I had earlier.

Saturday saw me take four hours out of the day to relax and just play video games. A stress-free afternoon was just what the doctor ordered as I was desperate to get some much-needed quiet time. Afterwards, Reese and I then went to Pittsburgh to do some shopping and capped the night off with a dinner at a place that's becoming a Rollo-Reese-and-Crock favorite - Hoss's. Reese even won me a hat from one of those "Sugarloaf" machines - you know the ones, filled with stuffed animals and whatnot. The hat is hilarious! It's a picture of a crocodile (for Crock) drinking a cold one and reads "Tailgator". Fits well!

When Sunday finally rolled around, we were already pretty hype for the AFC/NFC championships. Of course, both teams we were pulling for lost but I've got no objections to a Giants vs. Patriots Super Bowl. Early Sunday, Reese and I got about halfway through our "surprise project". This is something that I'll release soon, but I'd like to make it very clear from the start that this was all LaResa's idea.(Not to mention it being one of the coolest suggestions she's ever made! Seriously.) I remember discussing this very idea with Rollo a long, long time ago - long before I had met Reese - and its just really friggin' cool that her and I (and Rollo, I guess) are on the same wavelength. We'll hopefully have it finished within the next few days. Look forward to it!

buried treasure!

2008-01-17T15:20:00.001-05:00

Ever notice how some of the coolest things are hidden in some of the last places you'd think to look? This mostly happens with my Weezer CD's. I'll burn a disc or two, put them somewhere safe so they won't get scratched (like the cabinet in my bathroom) and eventually lose track of them. Whenever I want to listen to these discs, I'll go on a warpath to find them. I'll tear through every drawer, jewel case, or CD jacket I own until I give up and just burn the CD all over again. Then, one special day I'll be searching for aftershave or a decent towel and I'll stumble upon these CD's. A thought will briefly run through my mind; "Next time I burn a CD, I'll make damn sure I remember where I put 'em". The cycle then repeats itself.

Most recently, this has happened to my car keys. I remember coming home from class Monday night with a handful of things; my phone, gloves, a hat, a scarf, and my Garmin. My keys were also somewhere in that cluttered mess as well, and I remember throwing all of this stuff onto the kitchen table. I had THOUGHT I left my keys on the table as I normally do, though I am known to pile everything together in my room near my phone charger. Well, Monday gives way to Tuesday and my keys are GONE. I chalk it up to me being a jerkoff and that night, I kick up a search party consisting of my mom, Reese and I to track them down. I'm sitting here on a Thursday afternoon still missing my keys. I seriously must have either dumped them in the trash inadvertently, or stashed them away good. The biggest loss on this deal is that I've got two cases of Sam Adams "Lagers of Winter" outside just waiting to be drank... and my bottle opener is my keychain!

I told you these two stories to tell you this one. For a few weeks now, I have been secretly admiring Rollo's blog and Joe's myspace page because they've got facebook badges on them. For the longest time I had wished facebook would come up with something like this, to help others network. The trouble is, they created it and I must have missed the boat. After weeks of frustratingly searching facebook, its' help section and various forums around the web I just gave up. It wasn't until today that I stumbled upon how to create this "badge". I was looking at my profile at about the time one of my groomsman wrote on my wall. It was then I noticed that somehow my profile got all goofed up! Somehow, my "Wall" section had jumped up a few bars moving my "LOL Cats" to the very bottom of the page. I fixed it, but there at the bottom of the page lied my answer! Right where I never, ever look was a link titled "Create a Profile Badge". And the rest, as you can see to the right of this paragraph, is history. I can't believe the "wild goose chase" of a treasure hunt this turned out to be. Good thing I've got a "Pirate Crock" persona. Yarrr!

I'll bring the hot sauce

2008-01-16T15:18:00.001-05:00

Since everybody I know who blogs tends to be writing about "the past" or "memories", I thought I'd follow the trend and write about some things I like to remember.

Quite a few years ago my friend Tim and his family (the Hixenbaugh tribe) invited me to go camping with them in Erie for the fourth of July. This had to be during the summer of 2000 or so, and I was still a spry, young Crock. I remember thinking that the trip was grueling, over 200 miles to Erie? BAH! We spent the better part of a week in a pop-up camper, which was awesome because I then had a bad snoring problem. I think my fondest memory about the whole trip was when I gave total disregard to the campground's policy on clothing. In those days, I was sporting some sweet tighty-whities as my undergarb of choice. The story begins when I find my pair of magic underwear with a big hole in the right cheek one morning. I purposely set these aside. As afternoon wanes into evening, I take advantage of the beautiful sunset. I haul ass to the showers and lather, rinse and repeat. I dry myself. Then, I do something not short of a miracle: I don my hole-laden underwear and walk the hell outa there with a MANLY strut. The camper was parked a good 150-200 yards away so as I walked back, I made sure to greet onlookers with a "hey, howyadoin?" or "enjoyin' the day?". As I arrived back to the camper to dress, I don't think I heard Tim's mom laugh so hard before in my life. I dressed in the camper just to ensure everybody had something to scratch their heads about.

Another moment I'll never forget as long as I walk this earth happened on this same camping trip. As we approached our midweek dinner, we were tired of cooking out so we decided to hit the road and find some yums. We ended up at a chinese restaurant that served some KILLER crab legs. This was my first experience at a chinese restaurant. I credit this experience alone as having created my love/hate relationship with the oriental foodstuff. In fact, this food was so important to me at one point in high school that we would frequent the China Wok Buffet in Uniontown so often, that the waitresses would have our table and drinks set up for us (Jake, Chuck, Hix) as they'd see us walk in the doors. Those were some fun times. Unfortunately, after many conflict-riddled years of fighting incredible urges for chinese food, I've finally sworn the stuff off. I haven't eaten it in three or four months now and I don't plan on returning to it any time soon.

So there you have it. Two "spicy" memories. My fine ass + chinese food = the hot sauce. And I've brought both.

Let's start a war!

2008-01-14T15:07:00.001-05:00

Today's a long day. After work, it's back to school I go, as I wage scholarly war on the MBA program at Cal. I've dubbed my newest collegiate journey "Let's find Crock a MBA". Consol is paying 90% of the tab, so I'd be a fool not to enroll. The absolute best part of this is that since Cal is part of the State System of Higher Education, the aforementioned tab comes on the cheap. A cool $300 should cover this semester in FULL.

Now, a word about my schedule:
During this semester, I will be visited by two night classes per week and hopefully shortly thereafter, I'll be able to shout at a passerby from my bedroom window; clamoring about "what day it is" and "oh HO! I haven't missed it after all!"

And maybe a little about how to administer some business... which you'd already know I can do, if you've ever tried to fight me.

King of Prussia Mall

2008-01-10T10:39:00.001-05:00

The mall is massive. You can easily get lost. I frequently consulted mall directories and ended up finding a store where I picked up a very special gift for Reese. Now if I can only find a place that sells Philadelphia-style shot glasses...

I entered the mall via a Sears. I figure, since their parking lots are almost always empty, it should be pretty easy to get outa there. It turns out I was right, but I'll not get ahead of myself. The mall consists of two separate wings, a crosswalk and a main portion - all of which are giant. It took me about an hour and a half to course the place and just get a feel for it. As I paced along the hallways, I noticed it was decorated unlike any other mall I've seen. The mall itself claims stores like Versace, Coach, Hugo Boss and Armani and I suppose the ambiance reflects the uppish-ness of these stores. Couple that with classic music playing overhead, and you're not in southwestern PA anymore.

I really think its important to drag Reese, Jaker and Rollo out here and make them tour it, so I've completed an entire weekend trip to Philly in my mind. (Complete with mind-itinerary)

Other than that, here's some other notable features of Philadelphians:

Many food vendors in the KoP mall often have lots of fresh fruit available. Considering my lifestyle, I sincerely appreciate this.
They don't push the cheese-steak as hard as you'd like them to. Cmon, Philly. Grow a set.
Many people in the KoP mall value English as a second language. Listening to their arguments in gibberish was awesome!
Roads here actually lead where you'd think they'd go. Pittsburgh could learn a lot from the city of 'brotherly love'.
Any sporting goods store will welcome you with Donovan McNabb jerseys that are up to 60% off. There are NO exceptions.

As a final note, I really wish housekeeping would just leave my towels where I throw em. Just because they're on the floor doesn't mean that I'm through with them. I just don't wish to disgrace my toothbrush by making it keep company with soiled linens.

Hump day in Philly

2008-01-09T11:13:00.001-05:00

So its my first official blog from Philly. Here's how things have gone down so far.

I burst onto the scene in the evening hours of last Sunday. It was some trip out here. The majority of the trip was spent on a 232 mile stretch of interstate that was unforgiving (road wasn't kept well) and sleep inducing. It was easily one of the longest and most boring straightaways I've ever driven. Whenever I arrived, my hotel suite welcomed me. Its a nice 1-bedroom, 1-bath gig, complete with full kitchen and living room. In fact, its pretty nice. Pics should be up on my flickr / facebook by tonight. Pick your poison, they'll both house the same pics.

Monday was grueling. I was exhausted from the trip and had to go to SAP training (what I came here for) and really try to focus. The day crawled and I tried to soak everything in, but I was really just getting my routine started. When I was done with training for the day and returned to my suite (Staybridge Suites - recommended!) I had to learn how to quickly budget my time. With no future wife to prepare me a meal, I had to go running as soon as I returned so I can get showered, cook and enjoy some serious downtime. That takes me to about 8:00. I then like to enjoy a few hours of World of Warcraft before Family Guy at 11:00. Time seems to come at a premium. Its seriously seems like a lot of time, but brother, it sure isn't.

Tuesday saw me repeat the same process, but this time I was much more streamlined with it. I ended up with an extra half hour to do whatever, but it still hardly felt like I had any time at all. Couple that with trying to simultaneously soak in SAP information, and I'm two-days-garbled!

I'm planning on visiting the King of Prussia mall tonight. Its the second largest mall in the country, so I'm sure they have something there.

Some important things I've noticed about Philadelphians:

They have no concept as to what a "Giant Eagle" is. In fact, one girl asked me why I'd want to go see a big bird. Such a sweet girl...
Their WalMart is barn shaped and built next to a silo. It made Uniontown's WalMart look like the Taj Majal of superstores.
Radio stations here kick ass. 104.5 is an incredible station. Its like my whole iTunes library is available on my car radio. Only 30-60 second commercials, too. Nice.
5:00 traffic on any 4 lane highway crawls. 45 mins per 2-3 miles. Sickening waits.
SAP training center urinals are water-free. Not exactly sure what to make of this yet. I can appreciate how green this is, but I have NO idea how it works! (Crappers are standard crappers.)
The SAP training center also has ZERO water fountains. When I asked the woman at the front desk about a fountain, she informed me that the only water in the building is in water bottles in the cafeterias. (They recycle EVERYTHING.)

On a side note, the SAP training campus prides itself on being a "green campus". The facility I'm training in is an entirely glass building. Seriously, the whole building is a giant window. This I assume saves on lighting costs. In fact, the campus is in the process of building an additional training center next door to where I'm sitting now which will be the "greenest building in America". I respect the hell out of this.

More updates to come as I encounter more Phillyness.

NHL Winter Classic

2008-01-04T14:49:00.001-05:00

As you well know, I attended this game with the now legendary Reese, my mom and IDK my BFF Rollo. The first outdoor NHL game in the good old US of A didn't disappoint. In fact, it turned out to be everything I could have imagined, and more!

The weather was precisely how I dreamed it to be: moderate to heavy snowfall at times, cloudy and very cold. The crowd was impressive - 70,000+ strong - complete with Buffalo fans who never acted like assholes, but made all of us Pens fans know that we certainly aren't welcome here. Speaking of Pens fans, there was a large gathering of them that I got to Hi-5's and hugs from while on our way into the parking lot. During this ruckus (and believe me, it was RUCKUS) one brave Buffalo fan draped a Sabres flag over the front of the Vibe. He was quickly met with a chant of "THIS GUY SUCKS! THIS GUY SUCKS!" I love being in enemy territory. Sidney looked like he was a god among men. His play was so inspired and filled with raw energy that he appeared give life to his otherwise freezing teammates. What made it one of the best games I've ever seen was the fact that it went into a shootout. This was the first shootout I've ever witnessed live. I can tell you that I was pretty concerned about the Pens' fate after Conklin let in the first goal of the shootout, but as Rollo and I prepared the chant of "MVP! MVP!" for the final shooter, we knew we were in good hands. Crosby wouldn't let us down.

The good things aside, there were some crappy parts of the whole trip. First off, Ralph Wilson Stadium must be the Mellon Arena of the NFL. It should be torn down and forgotten in its entirety. The seating was awful, featuring LONG rows of bleacher seats that were small and uncomfortable. Our seats were in the very middle of a long row, not easy to get to! Another crumby thing was that their awful stadium had overpriced beers! At $7.50 for a cup of Guinness, the only good part about it was that, thanks to the weather, it could only get colder. Then comes lake effect snow. 4+ inches of snow and a 4.5 hour drive can quickly turn into 12 hours at the helm of the Vibe. Nasty stuff. We counted 11 wrecks, one of which was a combo Uhaul-while-towing-a-passenger-car. Nice work, that one was.

I'd go again if they had one next year, even if the Pens weren't involved.

Christmas Over!

2007-12-28T14:00:00.001-05:00

I had a long, detailed blog about Christmas and what I got, but decided it was WAY cooler to go itemized.
Here's the short-list:

Van Halen tickets
room & board for the NHL Winter Classic
about $200 (already spent, sorry thieves!)
a much needed sweater
as equally necessary pair of jeans
a replacement Anchorman DVD
a Dogma DVD (funny movie!)
the book: I Am America (And So Can You!)
by Steven Colbert
various car cleaning products
a collection of short Spongebob books
a handy mini shop vac
a scarf & gloves (the gift that warms my soul)
lottery tickets

Surprising exclusions from my gift list are:

94% of my Amazon.com wish list
a gift card of ANY kind
the gift of satire
(a comedic gift that would have played
on one of my few flaws)
a set of combs (i sold my hair to buy YOU combs...)

Up next: New Years. The new headliner image has been ready for a while now and will be uploaded... well, its already done! Enjoy the remainder of 2007 and here's looking forward to a ripping good 2008!

Scarves!

2007-12-19T09:20:00.001-05:00

I can't believe I've been so shortsighted through the years. In the winter I'm always cold. Always. So I've been pondering new ways to keep myself warm during the long, cold drive to work. The heater in my car works well enough, but I like to be extra, extra warm. Eight years ago, I had gone through a "Man, I sure dig Scooby Doo" stage. So for Christmas during my sophomore year in high school I received many a Scooby Doo gift. Among those Scooby presents I had received were a TV remote control holder, a small pocketwatch ( now that thing was AWESOME - had it clipped to my bookbag for years!) and a set of Scooby gloves & scarf. I've been wearing the scarf for a few days now. It's the first time I've ever really worn a scarf (besides when I go sled riding) and I must say, this thing keeps me REAL warm. I couldn't believe what a difference it made! My issue is that this thing probably would have fit me well in 2000, not 2007/08. When I tie it, it kinda looks like a bib! I don't care. It keeps me warm.

So, I'll be adding a few more scarves to my wish list this year.

Know yourself.
Heat is expensive.
Scarve yourself.

Sounds good

2007-12-14T12:55:00.001-05:00

I'm not much for music reviews, but I can certainly appreciate it when recording artists are inspired by other recording artists. It is only after spending several years with my best friend Chuck H. am I able to turn a keen ear to most music and notice when something is / isn't borrowed from Green Day's arsenal of albums.

Lately, I've been listening to a couple of songs by Sum 41. In particular "Walking Disaster" and "March of the Dogs". Vocally, they sound Blink-182ish. However, these two songs channel Green Day.

The first time I listened to "Walking Disaster", I immediately noticed similar guitar riffs to several songs from American Idiot. The guitars throughout the song are reminiscent of the chords in Green Day's "Letterbomb" as well as the second movement in "Jesus of Suburbia" (think: HEY!... <chugga chugga>... HEY!...) I'd say about nintey percent of the song is fast paced and can be interpreted in different ways. Personally, when I listen to the lyrics I think of New Orleans, hurricane Katrina and the aftermath:"The city's buried in defeat.
I walk along these no named streets..."
The two movements at the beginning and the end of the song pull from "Homecoming" and is somewhat structured like "Wake me up when September Ends". Listen here: YouTube.(audio only)

Their second song, "March of the Dogs" takes me back to Green Day's earlier albums. It seems that Sum 41 took their guitars from the beginning seconds of "Haushinka" from the nimrod. album. The more I listen to it, the more I think that it also borrows from Insomniac and "Panic Song". The lyrics are probably aimed at Bush:

"Ladies and gentlemen of the underclass,
The president of the United States of America..
Is Dead!"

The story here is not unlike the one told in American Idiot (the song); president's a moron (no head means no brains), the whole damn system is filled with liars, etc. The end of the song comically swings to a style that borrows from the "Tales of another broken home" portion of "Jesus of Suburbia". Listen here: YouTube.(music video)

While I'm not saying that these songs are on the same level as Green Day or any of their albums. What I am saying is that it's good to hear how others take a good idea (American Idiot) and put their own spin on it (Sum 41).

While not nearly mastered as well as Green Day's American Idiot, it's a nice spin on it and definitely worth a listen.

Tickets, man!

2007-12-12T12:29:00.001-05:00

After yet another successful year of concerts / events, I'll be rounding out the year in a "grand finale" style. Reese, Rollo, moms & I managed to hook up with tickets for BOTH the NHL Winter Classic (Pens vs. Sabres, outdoor game in Buffalo) and Van Halen.

On the Buffalo side of things, we'll be traveling up there the day before (New Year's Eve) so we can PARTY!@$#! We'll enjoy the game on New Year's Day, and return home later that afternoon. Thank god for "floating personal holidays" or else I'd be in some trouble.

Van Halen comes to us on a Friday. Finally, a concert that works WITH my schedule. Nary a thing on this earth, nay! birth of a child could keep me from this concert. How often does Van Halen do Pittsburgh? Oh, once every 30 years or so. By my count, you can have precisely 40 kids in that amount of time, if you fully dedicate yourself to the process. Not that I'm expecting, but damnit, this concert is important!

If you're planning to go to either / both of these events, LET ME KNOW! We'll do it up right!

I'm so festive

2007-12-07T11:26:00.001-05:00

God bless GIMP.

It keeps me somewhat creative while preparing my blog for the holiday season. To spell it out, I added some Christmas lights to my headliner up top. Its Crocktoberfest's first Christmas, so I wanna do it up right. It wouldn't make much sense to do up the blog with Christmas spirit in mid-July, now would it?

Psssst. Mid-July is our wedding. Keep the 12th open.

I also threw a little "graphics by GIMP" below my EXCELLENT LINKS section. Turns out the little fox (dog? no idea what that thing is) character's name is Wilber. I personally think that Wilber would make an excellent mascot for my blog as well as GIMP, though I'd never try to steal him away from his current job.

I admire your work, Wilber.

Baltimore (no Billy Idol)

2007-12-04T09:06:00.001-05:00

The Dan Band was amazing. We got to the venue a little early so we could get some great spots on the floor, and were three rows from the stage. Reese took some amazing pics! I'm sure they'll be facebook'd soon. The best part had to be when Dan called the "christmas ho" up on stage. He picked an old dude standing right in front of me to go up and dance with the backup dancers while sharing in the christmas spririt of being ho-ish. He did well as a ho. He even got a free "HO" t-shirt. Good for him!

Beer was $5 for bud light pounders. After a pre-show drink, we passed on drinking for the remainder of the evening. Two beers for $10? I don't think so.

The next day, Reese's sister took us around Baltimore and showed us the multi-million dollar mansions that we couldn't ever dream of owning. Some of these houses were the most massive homes I've seen in my life. One house had two full wings of the house covered in skylights. You know a house is huge when it has an east/west wing, but to cover them in skylights? That homeowner has some serious scratch to throw around.

The one thing I'll take from this trip is that Rollo & I can't navigate worth a shit. Reese is like our own personal Garmin.
(LaReese, LaReese, LaReese, LaReese, LaResa-Garmin!)

In the midnight hour...

2007-11-30T14:39:00.001-05:00

She cried, (balti)more, more more!

Headin' to Baltimore with Reese & Rollo this weekend to see The Dan Band, one of Rollo's most favorite bands. Speaking of The Dan Band, I want this to be very clear: Rollo has never ONCE ripped off a single Dan Band act. I'll not hear the lies. For as long as I've known Rollo, he's been acting, dressing and (more importantly) SINGING like a girl. If anything, its is DAN HIMSELF that copied Rollo. Maybe I'll make a facebook group in an attempt to liberate Rollo from the grasp of heathenism.

Hah. Naw, Rollo's alright. In fact, he and a mere pack animal (a ram) built the very venue in which The Dan Band will be performing. Sadly, a day before construction was complete, the ram died. In memory of his once alive animal friend, Rollo named the place Ram's Head Live - particularly because he liked his ram and he liked him alive.

While in Baltimore, we plan on visiting the sights! Like The Louvre, Space-camp and the official birthplace of the neon light!
...
Either that, or we'll check out a starbucks.

Its all gravy

2007-11-15T11:14:00.001-05:00

Yesterday at about lunchtime I visited the Giant Eagle Market District in Bethel Park. I hadn't decided if I was hungry or not, so I took a real solid look around the entire place. I, of course, was on my typical hunt for fat-free foods. I found some offerings of soup from Campbell's that I hadn't known about, in particular the New England Clam Chowder with one gram of fat in it tickled my fancy. That's pretty huge for me as I'm a lover of all things chowder. Despite the chowder, I have to think the best thing I found was the fat-free gravy.

This changes everything.

Thanksgiving would normally come and go and leave me very disappointed. Turkey is fine, yeah, but what's turkey without the gravy? What's fat-free mashed potatoes without that delicious slop? Ted (the gravy king) would have dumped me over the side of a boat and into a harbor a long time ago had he known I wasn't doing my civic duty by sampling the various Thanksgiving gravies. The best I could do would be to have some ketchup with my turkey (an OK thing, but that's about it). Now that the Heinz company has come through for me, I've now got another chance at truly enjoying Thanksgiving!

Bring on the turkey. Bring on the potatoes. Bring on the football. But most importantly:

Bring on the gravy.

Engaged

2007-11-12T11:16:00.001-05:00

I'm officially engaged. Reese & I made it official yesterday. I've got a blog so I'll chronicle it!

(To set the scene, She has NO idea I'm going to propose, let alone that I had a ring.)
Reese and I usually wake up early on Sundays and go to the park. I do some running, she does some walking and we eventually end up throwing some frisbee. This particular Sunday, we went to Rotary park in California where we first met. Its not unusual for us to go here, we spend at least a few hours there each week to get some exercise. I hid the ring in a zipper pocket of my running pants before I walked out the door of my house. When we get there, I talk with my buddy's mom who I had seen passing and Reese began her walk. A few laps into her walk she asks "Do you mind if we just skip frisbee today? It's cold." to which I reply "Nope, we're throwing some frisbee at least for a few minutes." I proceed normally. The ring is safely tucked inside my pants pocket and I run my mile. After my mile is complete, Reese and I walk toward the middle of the field. I put my hands in my pockets to make it look like I'm trying to "warm them up". I grabbed the ring and placed it in my left hand, still acting like I'm warming them up. She's still walking towards me, but I notice she's got her mitten to her mouth. "What's wrong?" I ask. She replied that she had thrown the frisbee up in the air, went to catch it, missed it and it fell and hit her square in the lip.

Precisely the opening I was looking for.

My original idea was to begin throwing the frisbee but "twist my ankle" and get down on one knee, then pop the question. It turns out I didn't need to do any such thing. She provided me the perfect opportunity to propose, herself. The frisbee had hit her upper lip, and she wanted me to to make sure there wasn't anything wrong (which there obviously wasn't) so I knelt down on one knee and told her to look up. I got the ring out, and when she looked down she was met with a "LaResa Mae Welms, will you marry me?"

I was a bit taken back by the way she replied initially, saying "Are you serious?" forcing me to push the whole ring thing harder. THEN! Then she leaves me hanging! For what felt like an eternity, she just kind of gawked and didn't say much. I could have sworn I was on my knee for an hour. Many thoughts ran through my mind. "Did I do this right?", "Is this the wrong setting?", "Why the hell isn't she saying YES?"

When I finally got the answer I was looking for (she said "yes") she flipped her wig. What started as some soft crying, exploded into what I like to call "The Hines Ward End Zone Dance." She does this bit of a jump-and-twirl dance each time Hines scores a touchdown (she's got him on her fantasy football team). So, I was relieved after she broke into dance. We exchanged some more mushy moments, while some people drove by beeping and yelling out the windows of their cars.

The best part of the whole engagement came while we were walking back to the car. She said, "This is exactly how I wanted you to propose: where we met." You couldn't spell RELIEF better if you handed me a burrito and some Pepto Bismol. All I could think at that moment was "home run".

She spent the rest of the day calling everyone on earth and letting them know that she was indeed engaged. It was a fantastic day filled with many a happy tear and many a good time. I'm really glad that I was able to do something really and truly right for that girl. Love you, Reese.

Terrible music

2007-11-09T11:23:00.001-05:00

Wanna hear a truly terrible song? Look no further than "Is there a Ghost?" by Band of Horses. Go here to listen to it.

Most music today friggin' sucks. Seriously, when did record labels come out and say "Okay, I want BAND X to repeat the same three lines over and over again but just change the music a little while you do it. That song by Band of Horses is an example of a truly bad song. I'm being very truthful when I say the song has three lines. THREE LINES! And they're getting national exposure. PATHETIC.

What the hell happened to music, nowadays? Remember "Take a Picture" by Filter? How about, "Everything is All Right" by Motion City Soundtrack. Those were some songs that maybe weren't great, but at very least they had lyrics that told a story.

This makes me wonder if I'm not the victim of a Band of Horses joke. I'm wondering if they made this song as one of those "filler" songs that they had never intended to go national, but if it did, they can laugh at the ridiculousness of it . If that were the case, I'd respect them for their funny-bone, but I seriously doubt an indie band like Band of Horses would do that. Its a damn shame that some suit was shortsighted enough to allow crap like that to ruin the good name plastic has given CD's.

Now, if you'd like to hear a good song, try "Thrash Unreal" by Against Me!

Great DVD player

2007-11-08T09:07:00.001-05:00

God, I need a new DVD player. A few years ago, my pops won a contest where he worked and ended up with this prize. It worked swell up until last year at some point. Each time Rollo, Reese and I sit down for an evening of movie watching, we can manage to get through about 3/4 of the movie before it starts skipping - sometimes back to the DVD menu itself! I don't know if it just gets too hot (it doesn't feel hot) or if its just another rickety piece of junk that somehow hammered out a few years worht of functionality. Whatever the case, I have another DVD player in my room that I always forget about. If I use brain sometimes maybe I get watch DVD movie yes? Yeesh, I'm a moron.

We ended up watching Stranger than Fiction and while it didn't really fit into what I thought I was going to see, I still enjoyed it. That is, I expected another Will Ferrell "slap-my-knee" comedy. At the end of the movie, I was more disappointed I didn't get many one-liners or clever quotes from it. Rollo had asked me what I had thought about it, and I replied "It's not my favorite, but certainly don't hate it." After sleeping on it, though, I realized that I did rather enjoy the movie. It could easily fit into my arsenal of movies. Good movie! I'll be sure to add it to my Amazon.com wish list.

Fer!

2007-11-02T16:05:00.001-04:00

Each month I'm going to update my banner at the top of my blog. Good fer me! So for those of you who enjoy those kind of "easter eggs", good fer you too!

Now, my real purpose for blogging. I typically write/post my blog via email. In my email, I have a very good spell check. It corrects me during those rare instances where I am wrong. Somehow, in my opening sentence (directly above) it failed to correct me when I typed the word "fer" intead of "for". I consulted the Merriam-Webster dictionary for the complete definition. Here's where that got me:

Main Entry:
-fer
Function:
noun combining form
Etymology:
French & Latin; French -fère, from Latin -fer bearing, one that bears, from ferre to carry — more at bear
: one that bears <aquifer>

Not so helpful!

Columbus? BLAH!

2007-10-29T11:36:00.001-04:00

Saturday was a riveting success. I'm speaking of course about the hockey game that both myself, Reese, McBride and Rollo enjoyed. The city of Columbus? Not so much.

Saturdays in Columbus are exactly like that of a classic western town whenever "Mad McGee" rode into town on horseback to shoot up the sheriff. All shops in the area were closed except for a lone Subway (one out of the six we passed) which is precisely where we went for a quick bathroom break. When we asked the three employees "Why is everything closed today?" one replied "Man, its Columbus and its Saturday." I guess the entire city shuts down for the weekend. I figured a capital city would at least have somewhere to go to grab a bite to eat (sans Subway). We were mistaken with a capital "M". After wandering the city for several hours, we asked a friendly police office where the nearest food venue (that offered lunch) could be found. I finally got to eat at a Max & Erma's, which was nice enough but offered NOTHING that I could indulge in aside from my few bottles of Newcastle Brown Ale. I pretty much starved until the hockey game (that Subway from above closed a few hours after we left --- yes we found out the hard way). At the game I had a salad which was pretty terrible, but the fruit punch I also ordered was spot-on. Sharks lost 2-1, but the day - believe it or not - was pretty damn fun. Lots of good jokes, good laughs and good times.

Reese found out that she not only shared a birthday with Rollo, but her BOY Milan Michalek. A funny thing about Reese's sports passion is that she lives and dies with each moment in the game. Especially Michalek's moments. Whew.

God bless the good company, the three and a half hour drive there would have been unbearable without it!

A dental success

2007-10-24T11:10:00.001-04:00

I recently completed my usual trip to the dentist, who had informed me in months passed that I needed to have a filling. I've had fillings before, sure, but none required the use of anesthetic. I don't like needles at all, so that tended to work out pretty well for me. This time around was a different story. It seems I needed some work on a cavity in the rear balcony area of my mouth. They called it a molar. I call it the cheap seats. No matter, I needed that dreaded shot to numb me up good. I guess whenever it comes to getting shots, I've not progressed past the mentality of a toddler. "A shot? NO! Wheres my sucker? WAAHHHHHHHH!!!!" Seriously, thats what goes through my head.

To my surprise, the dentist was damn good at preventing me from feeling anything at all. He rubbed a Q-Tip with some red goop on my gums first to numb them in a way that was not unlike ambasol. It had a strong cherry flavor to it, but its not something I'd consider for recreational use. After a few minutes, he jabbed me with the needle of numb-stuff and I didn't feel a thing. Turns out I was worried about nothing at all.